Helping Friends & Family Better Understand Romance Scams

Last Updated on by SCARS Editorial Team

Helping Friends & Family Better Understand Romance ScamsScams A Scam is a confidence trick - a crime -  is an attempt to defraud a person or group after first gaining their trust through deception. Scams or confidence tricks exploit victims using their credulity, naïveté, compassion, vanity, irresponsibility, or greed and exploiting that. Researchers have defined confidence tricks as "a distinctive species of fraudulent conduct ... intending to further voluntary exchanges that are not mutually beneficial", as they "benefit con operators ('con men' - criminals) at the expense of their victims (the 'marks')". A scam is a crime even if no money was lost.

Free Guide by the Society of Citizens Against Relationship ScamsSCARS SCARS - Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc. A government registered crime victims' assistance & crime prevention nonprofit organization based in Miami, Florida, U.S.A. SCARS supports the victims of scams worldwide and through its partners in more than 60 countries around the world. Incorporated in 2015, its team has 30 years of continuous experience educating and supporting scam victims. Visit www.AgainstScams.org to learn more about SCARS. [SCARSSCARS SCARS - Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc. A government registered crime victims' assistance & crime prevention nonprofit organization based in Miami, Florida, U.S.A. SCARS supports the victims of scams worldwide and through its partners in more than 60 countries around the world. Incorporated in 2015, its team has 30 years of continuous experience educating and supporting scam victims. Visit www.AgainstScams.org to learn more about SCARS.]

This Guide is intended for Family and Friends of someone that was involved in a Romance ScamScam A Scam is a confidence trick - a crime -  is an attempt to defraud a person or group after first gaining their trust through deception. Scams or confidence tricks exploit victims using their credulity, naïveté, compassion, vanity, irresponsibility, or greed and exploiting that. Researchers have defined confidence tricks as "a distinctive species of fraudulent conduct ... intending to further voluntary exchanges that are not mutually beneficial", as they "benefit con operators ('con men' - criminals) at the expense of their victims (the 'marks')". A scam is a crime even if no money was lost.

Also available on LinkedIn.com here »

Introduction

This is presented in the hope that it will help scam victims to explain what happened to them. We hope that by reading this you can understand that the victim was not at fault but was professionally manipulated beyond their will and control.

If you are a victim, we encourage you to share this guide with your friends and family so that they can understand what happened to you. This way you don’t have to explain the “how” and the “why” – this guide will do it for you, just the “what” if you choose to.

If you have experienced a romance scam or know someone that has and are seeking help or would like more information, call please visit our other educational and support information here on our website www.RomanceScamsNow.com or our pages on Facebook and other social media.

Understanding How It Happened?

A Romance Scam Is An Unusual Crime. It Starts With Just Saying Hello.

The internet was conceived as a place for all of us to come together, connect with new people, people from all over the world. We could learn about each other’s cultures, lives, and histories, and make the world a smaller happier place. Or so went the theory.

We all know that there are dangers out there, from viruses and malwareMalware Short for "malicious software," this term means computer viruses and other types of programs that cybercriminals use to disrupt or access your computer, typically with the aim of gathering sensitive files and accounts. to pedophiles that stalk their victims online. The old MySpace collapsed because it became a “groomingGrooming Grooming is a form of setting up a victim for a scam or other crime by befriending and establishing an emotional connection with the victim, and sometimes the family, to lower the victim's inhibitions with the objective of the scam or criminal activity.  Grooming includes the development of a trust relationship between the criminal and the victim, getting the victims to the point where they can be more completely manipulated.   ground” for Pedophiles until the Federal Trade Commission stepped in and forced it to change. Sadly, that was just one chapter in the long history of crime online. Fast forward to the present, and we now see a situation where organized global criminalCriminal A criminal is any person who through a decision or act engages in a crime. This can be complicated, as many people break laws unknowingly, however, in our context, it is a person who makes a decision to engage in unlawful acts or to place themselves with others who do this. A criminal always has the ability to decide not to break the law, or if they initially engage in crime to stop doing it, but instead continues. cartels are everywhere online.

But How Does It Happen?

It starts with someone sending a message or a friend request, they pretend to be someone that looks real and honest. Maybe a soldier overseas just wanting someone to talk to. Or a woman doing aid work wanting to talk with someone from home. It is a beginning that anyone could fall for and millions have. In the last 20 years, more than 15 million people have become victims of romance scams and another 10 million inside China. This is not a unique or isolated problem, yet few people really know much about these crimes are how people become victims.

Before you leap to any conclusions, such as that these victims are all stupid lonely people (which they are not), just understand that ANYONE can be scammed under the right set of socially engineered circumstances. Anyone! Intelligence is not a barrier either, smart people fall prey just as easily (maybe more easily) than dumb people. Skepticism or distrust is also no barrier or protection. Everyone can be scammed.

Steps To Doom

A romance scam starts with an inherent hard-wired willingness to trust strangers. Studies have shown that we all are more likely to trust a stranger over someone we know. [Learn more here] You probably have met countless strangers during your life and were inclined to initially trust them until proven otherwise. In the real world, we have the benefit of all of our senses to detect deception but online we have none of that, yet the same instinctive desire to trust is still at work.  This is how the scammerScammer A Scammer or Fraudster is someone that engages in deception to obtain money or achieve another objective. They are criminals that attempt to deceive a victim into sending more or performing some other activity that benefits the scammer. gets through the door.

Once a connection takes place the scammer begins an innocent enough conversation that can go on for days. Getting to know each other just like two real people would do. Obviously being alone and lonely plays a role in this. The scammers do their homework and target people who appear to be of the right demographic and appear to be divorced or widowed – lonely people make easy targets. They also target age ranges that make them less tech-savvy and very overconfident – seniors and teens for example, but in reality, anyone at any age can fall for a romance scam – though about 60% of the victims are women.

The Hook

Once the conversation gets comfortable the fraudsterFraudster A Scammer or Fraudster is someone that engages in deception to obtain money or achieve another objective. They are criminals that attempt to deceive a victim into sending more or performing some other activity that benefits the scammer. begins to apply a technique that causes an automatic response – a bit like setting the hook when fishing. Wired inside our brains is the older and more primal part called the Amygdala. The Amygdala is responsible for our fight or flight response – our emotional reactions to day to day stimuli, and most people lose their thoughtful control when it kicks in. It happens to you too when you get mad and argumentative – it is your amygdala that has taken control – this is called an Amygdala HijackAmygdala Hijack Amygdala Hijack An amygdala hijack refers to a personal, emotional response that is immediate, overwhelming, and out of measure (proportion) with the actual stimulus because it has triggered a much more significant emotional threat or hormonal response. This can include: Anger, Sadness, Love, Desire, etc. [Learn more here »]

The scammer understands how to use this Amygdala Hijack to bypass rational thought by simply saying “I Love You.” The victim is already in a kind of friendly relationship and they are alone and lonely. For most people when we hear those words we feel good. But when you are in a relationship with the hope of something more those words are a triggerTRIGGERS A trigger is a stimulus that sets off a memory of a trauma or a specific portion of a traumatic experience. in the brain that causes actual chemical changes releasing hormones that are the most powerful drugs in existence, and it is all automatic and beyond our control. This cocktail of chemicals in the brain short-circuits a lot of our natural intellectual defenses. You probably felt that yourself when you fell in love hard for the first time? But this is not love in the purest sense, this is masterful manipulation.

Hard-Core Manipulation

Eventually, the brain’s chemistry begins to balance itself out – over the course of days, weeks, or months, and nagging questions start to surface. Scammers are far from perfect, they work in a high-volume business where they work on dozens of victims at a time. They organize themselves into teams to work their victims 24/7. So leaks and admissions or mistakes happen, and the victim will pick up on some of these naturally. However by this time they are preconditioned to believe the scam and the scammer(s). This is where another manipulative technique is employed, the same kind of techniques used by the CIA or MI6 to enhance control of captured spies or terrorists.

This is a technique that systematically shifts the thinking of the victim towards what the scammer wants – it is called “GaslightingGaslighting Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation in which a person or a group creates the seeds of doubt in a targeted individual or group, making them question their own memory, perception, or judgment. It may evoke changes in them such as cognitive dissonance or low self-esteem, rendering the victim additionally dependent on the gaslighter for emotional support and validation. Using denial, misdirection, contradiction, and disinformation, gaslighting involves attempts to destabilize the victim and delegitimize the victim's beliefs. Once in this state the criminal can then more easily control the victim for their own purposes. Instances can range from the denial by a scammer that a scam has occurred, to belittling the victim's emotions and feelings, to the staging of bizarre events by the abuser with the intention of disorienting the victim. The goal of gaslighting is to gradually undermine the victim's confidence in their own ability to distinguish truth from falsehood, right from wrong, or reality from delusion, thereby rendering the individual or group pathologically dependent on the gaslighter for their thinking and feelings..” [Learn more here] Expert Gaslighting manipulates the victim into accepting the scammer’s lies and avoiding the search for the truth. Every battered spouse goes through this. Even people that have been cheated on have experienced some form of gaslighting. It is something that is real and works on anyone done expertly by the right person. These scammers apply this technique consistently over a long period of time that leads the victim into believing that their family and friends have turned against them and that they can only trust the scammer. The victim is deliberately isolated so the scammer can control them.

The combination of periodic restarting of the amygdala hijack and prolonged gaslighting can keep a victim captive for lengthy periods of time – from months to years. The victim will lose themselves and their connections to the people that could help them. They will gradually move into a world of the scammer’s making. Until something happens, usually they run out of money, then the truth is revealed. Once the victim learns the truth they crash and crash hard.

Who Is To BlameBlame Blame or Blaming is the act of censuring, holding responsible, making negative statements about an individual or group that their action or actions are socially or morally irresponsible, the opposite of praise. When someone is morally responsible for doing something wrong, their action is blameworthy. By contrast, when someone is morally responsible for doing something right, we may say that his or her action is praiseworthy. Blame imparts responsibility for an action or act, as in that they made a choice to perform that act or action.?

Who is at fault here? Certainly, the victim let the scammer in the door – how many times have we asked how that happened with other kinds of crimes? From fraudFraud In law, fraud is intentional deception to secure unfair or unlawful gain (money or other assets), or to deprive a victim of a legal right. Fraud can violate civil law (e.g., a fraud victim may sue the fraud perpetrator to avoid the fraud or recover monetary compensation) or criminal law (e.g., a fraud perpetrator may be prosecuted and imprisoned by governmental authorities), or it may cause no loss of money, property, or legal right but still be an element of another civil or criminal wrong. The purpose of fraud may be monetary gain or other benefits, for example by obtaining a passport, travel document, or driver's license, or mortgage fraud, where the perpetrator may attempt to qualify for a mortgage by way of false statements. A fraud can also be a hoax, which is a distinct concept that involves deliberate deception without the intention of gain or of materially damaging or depriving a victim. to rape to murder. We see in the news that they let their attacker inside. That is all (at least in part) because of our willingness to trust – that is why we have to tell our children over and over again not to talk to strangers. Our brains are not trustworthy, only hard-learned habits keep us safe.

It started with just talking with someone interesting online. It might have been a real person or a fake identity created by the scammer, but after that, the victim’s own brain worked against them controlled by serious manipulation techniques expertly applied by these large scamming cartels that train the thousands of people in their organization to do just that. But these techniques are not limited to scammers, boiler room telemarketers, politicians, advertisers, spies, police interrogators, they all use the same toolbox to bend us to their will.

Your friend or family member who was scammed was trapped in a web so powerful that it catches the most skeptical of people as well as the most vulnerable. Are they to blame? Should they have known better? What were they thinking? These are all rational questions, but the fact is this was an irrational experience. It blended the most addictive chemicals known: endorphins, dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin and others into a stew that trapped them and allowed the scammer to have control. It leaves them not really knowing how it happened. However, it was not their fault. Everyone can be scammed and to a lesser or greater extent, the same techniques would work on you too.

Immediate Concerns

In the period immediately following a romance scam, there are many concerns for the victim. This is a traumatic experience and these scams can leave the victim in shock and with symptoms similar to addiction withdrawal. Plus in many ways, this is like a psychological violation that can leave them in shock and disoriented – many victims describe it as though they had been raped (without the violence). It is important they recognize that they have had a romantic relationship and that its abrupt ending is no different than when any relationship ends, but in this case, it is compounded by the fact that the victim was lied to and manipulated both financially and psychologically. This can be a recipe for extreme instability and traumaTrauma Emotional and psychological trauma is the result of extraordinarily stressful events that shatter your sense of security, making you feel helpless in a dangerous world. Psychological trauma can leave you struggling with upsetting emotions, memories, and anxiety that won’t go away. It can also leave you feeling numb, disconnected, and unable to trust other people. Traumatic experiences often involve a threat to life or safety or other emotional shocks, but any situation that leaves you feeling overwhelmed and isolated can result in trauma, even if it doesn’t involve physical harm. It’s not the objective circumstances that determine whether an event is traumatic, but your subjective emotional experience of the event. The more frightened and helpless you feel, the more likely you are to be traumatized. Trauma requires treatment, either through counseling or therapy or through trauma-oriented support programs, such as those offered by SCARS..

During this period it is important to be supportive and watchful since romance scam victims take their lives every day. If you sense that they need help, try to get them on the phone with a crisis hotline (www.SuicideLifeline.org). These are staffed by professionals that understand how best to help people on the worst day of their lives.

In the immediate aftermath, many emotions are going to emerge. It starts with a mix of shock and disbelief (denialDenial Denial is a refusal or unwillingness to accept something or to accept reality. Refusal to admit the truth or reality of something, refusal to acknowledge something unpleasant; And as a term of Psychology: denial is a defense mechanism in which confrontation with a personal problem or with reality is avoided by denying the existence of the problem or reality.), with angerAnger Anger, also known as wrath or rage, is an intense emotional state involving a strong uncomfortable and non-cooperative response to a perceived provocation, trigger, hurt or threat. About one-third of scam victims become trapped in anger for extended periods of time following a scam. A person experiencing anger will often experience physical effects, such as increased heart rate, elevated blood pressure, and increased levels of adrenaline and noradrenaline. Some view anger as an emotion that triggers a part of the fight or flight response. Anger becomes the predominant feeling behaviorally, cognitively, and physiologically. Anger can have many physical and mental consequences. While most of those who experience anger explain its arousal as a result of "what has happened to them", psychologists point out that an angry person can very well be mistaken because anger causes a loss in self-monitoring capacity and objective observability. and rageRage Anger, also known as wrath or rage, is an intense emotional state involving a strong uncomfortable and non-cooperative response to a perceived provocation, trigger, hurt or threat. About one-third of scam victims become trapped in anger for extended periods of time following a scam. A person experiencing anger will often experience physical effects, such as increased heart rate, elevated blood pressure, and increased levels of adrenaline and noradrenaline. Some view anger as an emotion that triggers a part of the fight or flight response. Anger becomes the predominant feeling behaviorally, cognitively, and physiologically. Anger can have many physical and mental consequences. While most of those who experience anger explain its arousal as a result of "what has happened to them", psychologists point out that an angry person can very well be mistaken because anger causes a loss in self-monitoring capacity and objective observability. thrown in. The victim (as a result of the Gaslighting) may have alienated themselves from family and friends so they may not know who they can trust now. Regardless of what was real or not these things have been wired into their heads and it takes significant time to de-program them.

Try not to focus on any money the victim has lost as this can only delay their reconnection with reality by causing avoidance of the truth. Instead, try to be supportive but recognize that they may need expert care. There are two primary types of care for them: crime victims’ assistance and support (which SCARS offers free of cost), or mental healthMental health Mental health, defined by the World Health Organization (WHO), is "a state of well-being in which the individual realizes his or her own abilities, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to his or her community". According to WHO, mental health includes "subjective well-being, perceived self-efficacy, autonomy, competence, intergenerational dependence, and self-actualization of one's intellectual and emotional potential, among others". From the perspectives of positive psychology or of holism, mental health may include an individual's ability to enjoy life and to create a balance between life activities and efforts to achieve psychological resilience. Cultural differences, subjective assessments, and competing professional theories all affect how one defines "mental health". counselingCounseling Counseling is the professional guidance of the individual by utilizing psychological methods especially in collecting case history data, using various techniques of the personal interview, and testing interests and aptitudes. A mental health counselor (MHC), or counselor, is a person who works with individuals and groups to promote optimum mental and emotional health. Such persons may help individuals deal with issues associated with addiction and substance abuse; family, parenting, and marital problems; stress management; self-esteem; and aging. They may also work with "Social Workers", "Psychiatrists", and "Psychologists". SCARS does not provide mental health counseling.. Each has its merits and depends on the victim. Only about 30% of victims can use support groupsSupport Groups In a support group, members provide each other with various types of help, usually nonprofessional and nonmaterial, for a particular shared, usually burdensome, characteristic, such as romance scams. Members with the same issues can come together for sharing coping strategies, to feel more empowered and for a sense of community. The help may take the form of providing and evaluating relevant information, relating personal experiences, listening to and accepting others' experiences, providing sympathetic understanding and establishing social networks. A support group may also work to inform the public or engage in advocacy. They can be supervised or not. SCARS support groups are moderated by the SCARS Team and or volunteers. as a path, the rest will probably need mental health support locally – you can learn about local options through your health care providers, calling local hospitals, or talking to your local police about crime victims’ assistance services in their community. But be careful, they remain vulnerable to persuasion and there are thousands of self-styled groups online run by other victims – just because someone has been through this hell does not make them qualified to help others.

Effects Of The Scam

If your friend or family member is still trapped in the scam you should also look at our Guide for Friend & Family Intervention here

After The Scam, There Are Many Effects. None Of Them Good.

In all such cases, it is recommended to seek professional help with your medical or mental health professional since these experiences can be profound and leave lasting post-traumatic stress disorder [Learn more here] or other mental health issues in their wake. You can help them understand that support and counseling are good things and these can help them recover.

Three Kinds Of Romance Scam Victims

About 30% of victims go into denial. They either pretend it did not happen or simply hide from the world. Sadly these do not recover or recover poorly. They can remain broken for much of their remaining life, staying disconnected from life, family, and friends. An effort will be needed and probably medical professional support required to bring them around. There are numerous inpatient and outpatient programs that might help them. We suggest consulting them for details of their programs and how best to help these victims. Also recognize that these victims are likely to have suicidal thoughts and care should be taken to be both watchful and supportive, but make sure they have access to a Suicide Hotline Number (www.SuicideLifeline.org)

Another 40% of victims will be in a state of anger or rage following the scam. This is a natural response since it helps to readjust the brain and break the relationship bonds that formed. Anger is useful up to a point, but that line is crossed at the point where it turns into hate or causes other potentially serious disorders. If the anger does not subside to a manageable level quickly (a couple of weeks) there should be cause for some concern.

The remaining 30% are what we call “Realists.” They can understand what happened to them and even though they are experiencing a wide range of emotions, they can begin to work their situation intellectually. They will display the need to truly discover what happened to them and how to resolve whatever their current situation is.

Financial Disaster

The average victim loses about $3,000 but some lose hundreds of thousands or over a million. Victims can lose everything they own to scammers. They empty their bank accounts, remortgage their houses, sell everything and send the money to the scammer. The victim may not even fully understand how much they lost and will need help to realistically assess the damage.

The one central fact is that their life will not be the same afterward. The average victim will need years to recover financial – typically about 4 years, but sadly some will have lost so much that their life will never return to what it was supposed to be. They will need help in seeking assistance and working through all of this, particularly given their mental state.

In all cases, encourage them to focus on themselves and do your best to support them.

Responding To The Aftermath

After the scam, several things are going to be obvious to you. That your friend or family member is going to be in serious distress and will be unable to really talk about what happened to them. A big part of the reason is they don’t understand it themselves. Why should they? They are not an expert in this type of crime. But they will definitely blame themselves.

They are going to need help in understanding how these scams work and the effects that it had on them. By better understanding the mechanics of what was done it will help them properly shift the blame from themselves and onto the criminals that did this to them. Yes, they opened the door, but as we said before, once the romance scammer was let in the door they lost control. By starting the process of learning what and how it was done to them they can reestablish a measure of control in their lives, and your support will be crucial in helping them.

The most important thing you can do following a scam is to let them know that you are there for them and you will help them to recover.

How You Can Help

After the victim discovered the scam there is a range of things that must be done and you can help!

The very first thing is to gather the evidence and preserve if for both law enforcement and tax purposes. You can help them understand this and perhaps do the gathering for them since facing the communications with their scammer may be difficult.

The next thing is to help them be sure that they have cut off all potential communication with the scammer. Remember that they were susceptible and some victims will actually miss the connection they had so much that they will return to the scammer, giving the scammer another opportunity to create a new fairy tale. BlockBlock Blocking is a technical action usually on social media or messaging platforms that restricts or bans another profile from seeing or communicating with your profile. To block someone on social media, you can usually go to their profile and select it from a list of options - often labeled or identified with three dots ••• the scammer everywhere, even going so far as to deactivate accounts (do not delete them – most social media platforms let you turn off an account). Also, recognize that they let the scammer into their world and that means the scammer might have made “friends” with other friends and family members so the alert should go out. The victim will be too embarrassed to admit this, so you can help.

The victim is going to need to report this to the local police immediately. The police may be reluctant since there is little or nothing they can do about it, but ask them to take an “Informational” police report so you can get a report number for banking, insurance, and taxes. This is going to be very difficult since not all police are sensitive to this type of crime but you can be the buddy that helps them get through it. Also be sure they report the scam into our global scam reporting network on www.Anyscam.com Reporting matters and you can help them understand that.

Next comes the financial issues. Banks and credit card companies must be contacted. If money was sent via a money transfer agent such as Western Union or MoneyGram call them with your police report number to see what can be recovered. If gift cards were sent (meaning the numbers were sent by email or chat) call the card company to see if a refund is possible. In most cases the money will be gone forever. This is a nearly $50 billion dollar industry worldwide.

After these, the next thing is to start to recover, to move the focus away from the crime and criminal, and towards their own emotional recovery. You can help them find local resources or suggest that they join one of our online support groups on Facebook or MeWe.com

Women vs. Men Victims

Women tend to be more reluctant to report their scams to family and friends, but if you can get them talking they have a better chance at recovery and a happy life. Men tend to be very angry that they were fooled.

You know your friend or family member and what their personality is like. Each person is different and how they process the scam is also different. Expect more anger form men – they will want revenge – which is absolutely the wrong thing since it prolongs the anger and turns it into hate. Men recover at a much slower rate than women. In fact, support groups usually fail for men and they will be better seeking professional counseling. Women, on the other hand, tend to do much better in a community setting, either in local support groups or in our online support groups.

Help them understand how important that this is and is not something to avoid. There is much to learn and a supporting group of other victims can help accelerate that knowledge and provide a lasting pool of people to help them in the hard times to come. While you can be a good friend or family member to support them, victims need to hear from others who have experienced that same thing.

Road To Recovery

The process of recovery for a romance scam victim is not fast. It will take months and sometimes years before the victim feels like a survivorSurvivor A Scam Survivor is a victim who has been able to fully accept the reality of their situation. That they were the victim of a crime and are not to blame. They are working on their emotional recovery and reduction of any trauma either on their own, through a qualified support organization, or through counseling or therapy. And has done their duty and reported the crime to their local police, national police, and on Anyscam.com and it is behind them. Some victims will think they are over it quickly, but this is just a form of denial. The only cases where they get over it quickly is where it never really took hold of them and lasted no more than a few weeks. Once the more serious manipulation was underway it was doing damage, and it will take time to heal that.

Have the victim read our Three Steps Guide for New Victims

Many people have a need to have it over immediately, but just like with addicts there is a process and if they follow it there can be a positive outcome, but if they break the process the outcome can be quite different and take much longer.

What Are The Key Steps Your Friend Or Family Member Can Take To Recover?

  • Report the crime (local police, national police – FBI/www.IC3.gov, and SCARS) and block the criminal from all contact
  • Gain control of the financial loss however bad that may be (the money is gone and they have to deal with that)
  • Begin learning what happened and how (read reliable sources of information from ethical people online – not all are)
  • Stop fixating on the scammer and the fake identity (they will probably never know who it was and an arrest is not likely soon – it will only lead to obsession)
  • Have them join a support groupSupport Group In a support group, members provide each other with various types of help, usually nonprofessional and nonmaterial, for a particular shared, usually burdensome, characteristic, such as romance scams. Members with the same issues can come together for sharing coping strategies, to feel more empowered and for a sense of community. The help may take the form of providing and evaluating relevant information, relating personal experiences, listening to and accepting others' experiences, providing sympathetic understanding and establishing social networks. A support group may also work to inform the public or engage in advocacy. They can be supervised or not. SCARS support groups are moderated by the SCARS Team and or volunteers. and go to counseling (our support groups are safe private places offered free of cost)
  • Be patient – this will take a long time but eventually, they can recover – they can get through this

What You Can Do To Help Others

Your friend or family member was a victim of a global criminal cartelCartel A scamming cartel is any criminal organization with the intention of engaging in larger-scale financial fraud operations. They range from loosely managed agreements among various scammer gangs to formalized commercial enterprises. The term was applied when the largest scammer gangs organizations reached a size and scope of a major enterprise, including control of corrupt politicians and local officials. In truth, most scammer cartels do not exactly meet the definition of a cartel, but the term stuck and it is now popularly used to refer to any large criminal fraud organization. with more than 100,000 scammers operating worldwide. You can help spread the word to everyone that you know about how these scams work and that anyone can become a victim. Did you know that 15-year-old girls are the fastest growing segment of victims (for both romance scams and sextortion)? No one thinks this can happen to them, but it can. Only by learning and changing habits can we all remain safe.

But you have to do your part. You have to talk about this with the people you know. Some are already victims and you just never knew, but by bringing it out into the light you can help them too. Most importantly you can play a role in keeping the rest of your family and friends from harm. Victims find it very difficult to do this, but you do not have the embarrassment or emotional trauma to prevent you from helping.

You can start by becoming a SCARS Member  – just go to www.AgainstScams.org and lend your voice to our movement to stop these global crimes.

You can also donate to SCARS so that we can help other victims – just $5 is a way to help other victims – go to donate.AgainstScams.org to donate or learn more.

Questions And Answers

  • Romance Scams are an international crime that usually involves a fake identity to fool a person into engaging in a massively manipulated romantic relationship.
  • Romance Scams do not happen because the victim was stupid, they happen because the scammer socially engineered a set of conditions to trap the victim.
  • Romance Scams can happen to anyone since it is based upon triggering the victim’s own brain against them then sustaining the scam through spy-craft style manipulation.
  • Romance Scams don’t just happen to sad lovely people, they can happen to anyone, even people that are married – anyone can be scammed.
  • Romance Scams victims cannot simply get over it, they involve deep-seated trauma that can result in PTSD or other disorders and professional help may be required.
  • Romance Scams are a major challenge to law enforcement worldwide since it involves international treaties and extradition, and the host nations in Africa benefit from the influx of money.
  • Romance Scams began in the early 1990’s and have grown into an industry rivaling the illicitillicit Illicit means something that is not legally permitted or authorized under the law; unlicensed; unlawful. It can also mean disapproved of or not permitted for moral or ethical reasons. drug industry, and they help support human trafficking and terrorism.
  • Romance Scams require a globally concerted effort both at the grassroots level to help educate others, and at the governmental level to improve laws and treaties to promote greater enforcement.
  • Romance Scams can be stopped with education and safe habits online, and the diligent efforts of people just like you!

About This Guide

This guide was produced by the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams [SCARS] a nonprofit nongovernmental organization based in Miami, Florida, U.S.A., with affiliations with the United States Department of Homeland SecurityDepartment of Homeland Security The United States Department of Homeland Security (DHS) is the U.S. federal executive department (under the President) responsible for public security, roughly comparable to the interior or home ministries of other countries. Its stated missions involve anti-terrorism, border security, immigration and customs, cybersecurity, and disaster prevention and management., Department of Justice, and other entities worldwide. It is a registered online crime victims’ assistance and support organization. SCARS represents nearly one million victims worldwide with member groups in over 60 countries, plus has its own offices in in the U.S., Mexico, and China supporting romance scam victims worldwide

This guide was authored by Dr. Tim McGuinness, SCARS Director.

 

TAGS: SCARS, About Romance Scams, Friends & Family, Understanding Romance Scams, Information About Scams, Anti-Scam, Scams, Scammers, Fraudsters, Cybercrime, Crybercriminals, Romance Scams, Scam Victims,

SCARS the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Incorporated

SCARS™ Team
Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc.
A Worldwide Crime Victims Assistance Nonprofit Organization
Visit: www.AgainstScams.org
Contact Us: Contact@AgainstScams.org

PLEASE SHARE OUR ARTICLES WITH YOUR FRIENDS & FAMILY

HELP OTHERS STAY SAFE ONLINE – YOUR KNOWLEDGE CAN MAKE THE DIFFERENCE!

REPORT-BLOCK-RECOVER

REPORT-BLOCK-RECOVER

 

 

 

 

The Latest SCARS Posts:

FIND MORE SCAM NEWS
«SCAMCRIME.COM»

JOIN US ON FACEBOOK
«CLICK HERE»


END


MORE INFORMATION


– – –

Tell us about your experiences with Romance Scammers in our
« Scams Discussion Forum on Facebook »


– – –

FAQ: How Do You Properly Report Scammers?

It is essential that law enforcement knows about scams & scammers, even though there is nothing (in most cases) that they can do.

Always report scams involving money lost or where you received money to:

  1. Local Police – ask them to take an “informational” police report – say you need it for your insurance
  2. U.S. State Police (if you live in the U.S.) – they will take the matter more seriously and provide you with more help than local police
  3. Your National Police or FBIFBI FBI - Federal Bureau of Investigation The Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) is the domestic intelligence and security service of the United States and its principal federal law enforcement agency. Operating under the jurisdiction of the United States Department of Justice, the FBI is also a member of the U.S. Intelligence Community and reports to both the Attorney General and the Director of National Intelligence. A leading U.S. counter-terrorism, counterintelligence, and criminal investigative organization, the FBI has jurisdiction over violations of more than 200 categories of federal crimes, including financial fraud. « www.IC3.gov »
  4. The SCARS|CDN™ Cybercriminal Data Network – Worldwide Reporting Network on « www.Anyscam.com »

This helps your government understand the problem, and allows law enforcement to add scammers on watch lists worldwide.


– – –

To learn more about SCARS visit « www.AgainstScams.org »

Please be sure to report all scammers
on « www.Anyscam.com »

 

Disclaimer:

SCARS IS A DIGITAL PUBLISHER AND DOES NOT OFFER HEALTH OR MEDICAL ADVICE, LEGAL ADVICE, FINANCIAL ADVICE, OR SERVICES THAT SCARS IS NOT LICENSED OR REGISTERED TO PERFORM.

IF YOU’RE FACING A MEDICAL EMERGENCY, CALL YOUR LOCAL EMERGENCY SERVICES IMMEDIATELY, OR VISIT THE NEAREST EMERGENCY ROOM OR URGENT CARE CENTER. YOU SHOULD CONSULT YOUR HEALTHCARE PROVIDER BEFORE FOLLOWING ANY MEDICALLY RELATED INFORMATION PRESENTED ON OUR PAGES.

ALWAYS CONSULT A LICENSED ATTORNEY FOR ANY ADVICE REGARDING LEGAL MATTERS.

A LICENSED FINANCIAL OR TAX PROFESSIONAL SHOULD BE CONSULTED BEFORE ACTING ON ANY INFORMATION RELATING TO YOUR PERSONAL FINANCES OR TAX RELATED ISSUES AND INFORMATION.

This content and other material contained on the website, appsApps Applications or Apps An application (software), commonly referred to as an ‘app’ is a program on a computer, tablet, mobile phone or device. Apps are designed for specific tasks, including checking the weather, accessing the internet, looking at photos, playing media, mobile banking, etc. Many apps can access the internet if needed and can be downloaded (used) either for a price or for free. Apps are a major point of vulnerability on all devices. Some are designed to be malicious, such as logging keystrokes or activity, and others can even transport malware. Always be careful about any app you are thinking about installing., newsletter, and products (“Content”), is general in nature and for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical, legal, or financial advice; the Content is not intended to be a substitute for licensed or regulated professional advice. Always consult your doctor or other qualified healthcare provider, lawyer, financial, or tax professional with any questions you may have regarding the educational information contained herein. SCARS makes no guarantees about the efficacy of information described on or in SCARS’ Content. The information contained is subject to change and is not intended to cover all possible situations or effects. SCARS does not recommend or endorse any specific professional or care provider, product, service, or other information that may be mentioned in SCARS’ websites, apps, and Content unless explicitly identified as such.

The disclaimers herein are provided on this page for ease of reference. These disclaimers supplement and are a part of SCARS’ website’s Terms of Use

Legal Notices: 

All original content is Copyright © 1991 – 2021 Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc. (D.B.A SCARS) All Rights Reserved Worldwide & Webwide. Third-party copyrights acknowledge.

SCARS, SCARS|INTERNATIONAL, SCARS, SCARS|SUPPORT, SCARS, RSN, Romance Scams Now, SCARS|INTERNATION, SCARS|WORLDWIDE, SCARS|GLOBAL, SCARS, Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams, Society of Citizens Against Romance Scams, SCARS|ANYSCAM, Project Anyscam, Anyscam, SCARS|GOFCH, GOFCH, SCARS|CHINA, SCARS|CDN, SCARS|UK, SCARS|LATINOAMERICA, SCARS|MEMBER, SCARS|VOLUNTEER, SCARS Cybercriminal Data Network, Cobalt Alert, Scam Victims Support Group, are all trademarks of Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc., All Rights Reserved Worldwide

Contact the law firm for the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Incorporated by email at legal@AgainstScams.org

Share This Information - Choose Your Social Media!