Updated on October 29, 2019 by SCARS Editorial Team

SCARS|RSN™ Scammer Methods: The Questions – A Scammer’s Primer – Part 2

Scammers Have A Variety Of Guides They Follow To Learn And Expand Their Knowledge Of Scamming

They use these guides to learn how to engage their victims and create moments to deploy hooks to begin the capture process.

After their initial hello, they begin an interrogation process to both learn about the victims and to create vulnerabilities. They are then better able to apply their manipulation techniques to dominate their victims.

In this series, we will be presenting excerpts from such scammer guides to help you recognize common styles and patterns that scammer use on their victims.

The following was design to scam women, but the same questions can be applied to men.

From One Of Their Guides – Unedited:

A THOUSAND QUESTIONS – GETTING TO KNOW THE VICTIM

This is about keeping up with her (build that comfort with her before preaching love)

Step 1 === online experinces

• How long have you been using this platform? So tell me something, how are your experiences so far on Dating Websites been with Men Online
• I am new here, registered a week ago, and so far my experiences has been Terrible. I find most women are looking for sex only.
• No one is really looking for a Relationship. I have been single for 3 years now. And it took me so many years to find myself and to realize what it is I’m looking for, I want a soul mate that will take her time to know me and Love me for who I am and not what have.
• Though I have some weird experiences with some woman, but I believe there’s a Good Woman out there for me, I have the courage that I will find the woman whom I which to spend the rest of my life with. I do believe in soul mates. I have seen people that have found theirs and live very happily with them and I have decided a while ago that I would never “settle” for anyone less than my soul mate. I am here because I know life is not all about me.” That is why I decided to join that site, because I am hoping to meet someone nice enough to share life’s simple pleasures with. I hope to find someone I truly connect with. Someone who likes to laugh and have fun, but can be serious as well. I am looking for someone that will be my best friend and more. Someone who has my best interest at heart because I will have hers. It would be great if I could talk to her about anything.
• Where originally are you from? And where do you live now
• I’m originally from Scotland . I base in American, My Dad was born and raised in Scotland. While My mom was from Dublin
• What’s your present Marital Status, do you have kids?
• I am a widower. I lost my wife through Maigrain a serious headach 3 years ago. I was emotionally devastated when my wife died, but I stay firm and strong for my beautiul daughter lisa…
• What do You think about A Distance Relationship?
• I think when Two People are strong enough, they can make anything Work out, but it does take much understanding and Patience, This is how I feel, I would swim a Thousand Rivers and Climb a Hundred Walls just to be with the Person I Love
• Are you willing to relocate if you find your soul mate?
• For me it depends on my soul mate; If she willingly wants me relocate to Her Home, its okay with me, but if she likes to relocate to my Home that will be fine so long as we stick together as ONE, Perhaps she might want us to Buy another Home, it fine as long as she’s the happiest Woman on Earth
• What’s your religion?
• I am a practicing Catholic. If you are, that’s great, but if you are Lutheran or Anglican, that works too! After all, I like to focus on what we have in common, not our differences.
• Are you a God fearing woman?
• I am a God fearing man, I do have my Christian faith to credit for my life, attitude and success; however, I don’t use the name of God to attract women for my character speaks for itself. I am not the type of man who is focused entirely on himself.
• What are Your Hobbies?
• I enjoy, cooking, swimming, and reading, walking on the beach, fishing, camping, scrabbling, playing checkers and seeing good comedies. I love the outdoors mountain biking, camping, fishing, horseback riding, outdoor photography and also spending some time out with my friends and also my son.
• What’s Your Favorite color?
• My favorite colors is white sign of purity, peace & nobility.
• How often do you like to go out; I mean going partying?
• I do not go out often that much ever since, I lost my late wife, because going out alone seems not enjoyable to me, so the few time that I go out must be with my kids and I will be looking forward to go out with that special lady someday.
• So tell me how big is your family? I mean how many brothers and sisters you have? What about your parents? Dad died when I was just a kid, My Mom raised me up as a single Mom, she passed on May 12, 2001. I’m the only Child of my Parents, Chloe and Oshyn are the only close family I have got at the moment, they’re my best friend, sister and everything to me.
• Do you seek for a particular age before coming into online Dating? How old are you?
• I’m 50 years old. I do not seek for a particular age, because I feel age is numbers, you do not know where love can hit you up from. It can be someone younger than you or perhaps older than you.
• How many relationships have you been into before you came into online dating? I had three (3) deep relationships in my life; The first I had was when I was still a teenager with a girl named Amber, we were both attending the same school in London, she was from Milan, then we used to see each other everyday, helping one other with our assignment,
  unfortunately after our final exam at high school, she told me that her parents will be leaving London back to Milan and she was going with them also, I felt like wooh!!!, that means that you are going to leave me, she said she does not know what to do, so they left I was really unhappy during that period. The second was with my late wife and was my longest relationship, we were married for 17 years, I met her at my home town, Queens, New York. After her death I stayed a year and 5 months alone were I had a very special lady Named Ana; she was from Wyoming, I thought I was going to get married to her. We stayed 3 months together and I later found at that she was lieing and has been cheating on me, so I had to brake up with her and it hurts so much and so bad. Since then I have been single and I decided to come into online dating and find my soul mate.
• Do you know what went wrong in your past relationship? Cheating and lies made my last relationship ended. I am a very comprehensive person. When there is something wrong with my relationship, I don’t fight, and be hysterical, I like to talk. A better conversation is always the best solution for everything, but of course with every experience you learn more how to deal, and always there is something new for you to discover.
• What attracts you to a man? Truthfulness and respect. I’m not after physical apperance, but I value good characters, It really makes me get closers to a person inside; I do considers that more important because beauty fades with time but the person inside appreciates with time. I go for the inner beauty, it radiates and it speaks for itself over
  time and for a woman like you who is family oriented is an added advantage to me.
• What are your likes and dislikes? I like real things; I like honesty, truthful, caring and obedient person. I dislike dramas, cheating, lies, disrespect, racist & Betrayal. I want someone that will love me for me, regardless of age, distance, language barrier, cultural differences or material purpose. Because I do believe love knows no barriers and is the conqueror all things.
• So what do you expect from me? I want you to treat me right, be truthful and honest with me, because I do believe in the Gospel truth and that’s what I want. A long term
  relationship with someone like you… I want to feel true love and happiness with you and share everything with you based on Love, Trust & Understanding.
• What are your goals or dreams in life? Thanks for trusting me enough to tell me your DreamI , I’m sitting here starring all over thinking how you got such a Beautiful dream… My
  goals and dreams in life is to be with the woman I will love forever and live happily with HER forever.
• What motivates you? I’m motivated by life itself, because life is what you made it. I love all that life has to offer.
• Do you smoke cigarettes or drink alcohol or do drugs? I am a normal guy; I do not take drugs to keep me on track. I had never smoked in my life neither used drugs and never pretend too, because it’s not for me. If I drink alcohol; well I drink socially, if I go out with some friends and they are drinking something light its okay.
• So tell me; what is your favorite food? My favorite food is Pasta. I love to cook great home made meals and try new recipes when I am in town with my daughter. I also love to exercise and the importance of being healthy and eating healthy. Would like a lady to cook with! So romantic!
• What’s your favorite drink? My favorite drinks Red Wines, but I prefer Champagne more likely.
• What are your favorite movies? Titanic is the only movie topping my list
• What are your favorite TV Shows? Rich Texan, One Trill Hill, CSI, Oprah.
• What brand of music do you like? I love blues, 80s, and 90s, Rnb, Jazz, Gospel Jams, and RocknRoll.
• Do you have a favorite musician in particular? Hmm, Don Williams is a nice artist who inspires me in terms of music for that he is my number one musician.
• What about your favorite music band? Mine is ABBA
• Are you a sports fan? And what are your favorite sports? I have a passion for sports and my favorite sport is football and I also like Sea Fishing, kayaking, boating, sailing are my sports of choice. I’m not afraid to speak my mind, trust my gut, and follow my heart. Even if it gets me in trouble…lol
• Do you have any favorite sport team you support in particular? Manchester United football club that’s my team, I love their pattern of playing when I am in town I love travelling going to watch their match together with my daughter.
• What inspires you in life? God inspires me, with his love and mercies he shows us each passing day.
• Do you believe in true love? Yes, I do.
• What turns you off? Anything fake, lies, deceit, cheating, quarreling and argument turns me off.
• How do you feel when someone upset you? And what will you do to calm yourself down? I do feel unhappy for that moment; go to quite place and listening to a cool music that will calm me down.
• If you could change something about yourself, what would it be & why? I would change how I tend to dwell on the past, because it’s really dragging me down lately. Our  experiences in life made us who we are. No one is free from difficult times in life or what some may call baggage. How you’ve dealt with those experiences will determine if you’re damaged or resilient. I’m a prime example of resilient and not looking to do damage control. I understand everyone has old baggage, but I want someone who has put the old baggage up for old memories and is ready to create new memories. Life is short and you never know about tomorrow, so if you want to live life “like there is no tomorrow.
• Who is your mentor? My mentor is my late dad, he was a nice, caring and understanding dad, who loves and take good care of his family, he always speaks the truth and he is a self discipline man, my dad is ready to risk everything he has for his loved ones, but I do feel the pain because he never lived to enjoy me, he was really the best dad in the world. He always tells me that uneasy lies the head that wears the crown, so for you to be successful in life you have to face some challenges.
• So tell me; what are some of the places you have visited? I have already lived in Italy when I was young, before moving to the states with my parents. I have been out of the States several times on different occasion, maybe on a work trip, or vacation trip. My work has took me to places like; Spain, Malaysia, England.While on vacation trip I and my daughter have been to; Switzerland, Italy, Yugoslavia,Greece, Bermuda, Paris, Rio DE Janeiro of Brazil, and Dubai. I would love my next vacation trip to be with that special someone, because I don’t believe I’m destined to travel this road alone; I look forward to sharing my last journey in love, laughter & friendship. Loving a woman is no longer enough for me. The genuine friendship that develops, enjoying each others company, the ability to communicate one’s needs, desires, hopes & dreams, for me, will sustain the relationship. I may not be perfect, but I am perfect, for someone. Looking for my “Lover and Companion” to live a fun loving life and “Travel” around the would with. I’m looking for a woman who is a good communicator.
• So tell me when travelling do you travel alone or you like travelling with a Companion? I love travelling with my daughter, because she is my only family that I have now.
• Describe the perfect vacation you have had? It was way back flying to Paris with my daugmm, then taking a train through France, Switzerland, Italy, Yugoslavia, and Greece. Then
  spending 1 month on Santorini a Greek Island together with my son. I had the time of my life, and these are my fondest memories. I will do it again.
• What is your biggest fear? My fear is my Only Courage, I have no fear in my heart so I’ve got to push on through with Life.
• What has been the best decision you’ve ever made? Choosing not to dwell on my past, but rather be happy because Life is too short to be unhappy
• What 3 physical features do you get compliments on most? My eyes, smiles, skin/complexion, and sometimes my voice too. People like it for some reason.
• What is your best Moment? My Wedding Day
• Your worst moment in life? May 12 2001 when my Mom died through Heart Cancer
• Have you ever thought of leaving your country in search of the man you want to be with in the future? Yeah, like I said; I would swim a Thousand Rivers and Climb a Hundred
  Walls just to be with the Person I Love
• What languages can you speak? Which would you like to learn? I speak English fluently
• What are the five most important things in your life? God, Family, Love, My Daughter & living to help others without asking for anything in return.
• Tell me One thing you can’t live without My Family; They are the reason I work hard to be a successful, I will give my family the life they deserve and make them very happy for as
  long as I live
• What would you cook for a date at home? Smiles!!! That is going to be a secrete because I will be making her favorite meal…Even if I do not know how to, before then I must get
  instructions from good quality chefs and also read cooking books, to meet up to perfection the day I will cook the meal.
• What positive lessons have you learned from your past relationships that will help you succeed in future relationships? “Love” “Trust” & “Understanding”.
• How do you normally spend your leisure time? Listening to music, cuddling up reading a magazine or watching TV, cooking.
• How much do you enjoy walking in the park? I enjoy it a lot; feel the fresh air of the nature, viewing the beautiful green trees.
• If you are at a loose end what are some of the following things you do? I will have hope and never to give up.
• What do you think is the biggest mistake that men/women make in their relationships? Not trusting, understanding and trying to find time and share things with each others.
• I know this question can be out of the line… lol Lets say If you could wake up tomorrow with any superpower, what would it be? Hmm, that would be the power of Clark Kent also known as superman, I want to be the one to save the day.
• If you are found guilty of a crime, would you admit yourself and accept your mistakes? I will admit my self, accept my mistakes, and face the consequences, because I am a God fearing man, and I do abide to the truth.
• If you see somebody you don’t know who needs help, would you be of any support? Yes I would help in anyway, because God in heaven says it is good to help those that are in need and he loves a cheerful giver. I think it’s important to have compassion for others in need of help. I have a good and caring heart. I don’t like arrogance or to be selfish. It’s the strangest thing, but kindness attracts kindness, like whenever I see someone’s car got broke down, I always love to help and assist that person, because when mine also gets broke down or I had a flat tire someone always has come to my rescue.
• In a relationship how do you see a situation whereby the woman earns more money than the man? A good relationship where two lovers understand each other, they’re concerned for each other and they respect one another, I don’t think that there will be problem about that, to me is no problem as far as they both love their selves.
• Are you a left or right handed person? I am a right handed person
• Do you any tattoos and body piercings? I don’t have any tattoo, but I do have my left ear pieced and some times I do wear earrings…lol
• Can you drive a vehicle? Do you have a car? I have 2 cars that I drive when I am back in town; I have a Benz G Class 2012 and a Mitsubishi Outlander 2012, but love to get a new one for myself and for you baby, because you happen to be the apple of my eyes and that I believe I will accomplish as soon as I finish my Contract
• Are you financially stable? Yes of course I am financially stable, I do receive a high income from my Job so there’s no need for me to be afraid of any financial situation.
• What do you spend most of your money on? Though I have not got the time to settle around in town and relax with what I have of which I’m not boasting off, but when I’m in town for the few times; I enjoy going shopping and spending vacation abroad with my daughter. I have a lot of taste for fashion and clothing line up as Dolce and Gabana is my favorite brand. I also enjoy spending money on designing my home with the nicest and latest home appliances. I already have my eyes set to have a registered company of my own that
  will deal into supplying of FPSO materials to offshore and onshore fabrication companies, that I will do when I have finally settle down with a woman right beside me and I can call my wife.
• Do you like holding hands and exchanging casual kisses with your partner? Yes…Holding her close and make her feel the warmth of my body while kissing her.
• Do you think you can be trusted by your man? Yes of course I can be trusted, because I am ready to open up my mind and my heart and also lay down my life for the woman I love.
  Marriage they say “Is For Better, For Worse” do you believe in this principle? Yes, I do believe in that, because that is where you have to show that you love your partner very much.
• Do you like to re-marry again? I can remarry again when she love me and love my daughter so much that she care about the family been together as one big family with so
  much.
• Have you talked about your feelings with someone else? Yes and you are the only person whom I am sharing my feelings with.
• What’s the best dream you’ve ever had? My Sex Fantasy Dream about us.

These are directly from one of their guide books that they copy and paste in messages to new prospect victims.

The above was unedited. We did not change the grammar or the punction – bad though it is. You can see it is full of scammer grammar!

You will notice that it is full of local (African) phrasing and terms. If you look carefully you can spot them.

The major issue you will notice in this is how the questions are designed to “groom” the victim into specific directions – trusting the scammer, the scammer’s interest in business deals, and violating that trust. These help set the stage for the scammer to leverage that grooming process with Amygdala Hijacks, and the full-scale gaslighting-style manipulation and control.

If you are not a native English speaker you would not notice the odd phrasing of many of these questions.

Keep an eye out for any of these, assuming you are still talking to strangers! Just remember, that ANYONE that contacts you directly that you do not know or have a prior affiliation with is going to be a scammer!

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SCARS|RSN™ Team
A SCARS Division
Miami Florida U.S.A.

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Romance Scams Avoidance Education & Scam Victims' Assistance & Support Organization at SCARS|RSN™ Romance Scams Now™ is a division of the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams™ [SCARS]

SCARS|RSN™ RomanceScamsNow.com™ is the official knowledge and victims' support publication of the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams™ Incorporated [SCARS]™ It is edited and published by the SCARS|RSN Team, a division of SCARS. SCARS is the world's leading anti-scam charitable nonprofit nongovernmental organization, based in Miami Florida U.S.A. Its founder has been involved in combating online fraud since 1991. SCARS™ - the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc. is a charitable nonprofit nongovernmental organization (NGO) dedicated to advocating victim's causes and changing government and law enforcement attitudes toward online fraud for good! Please join us in becoming a member of SCARS - it's free! Add your voice so that the world will listen at last - just go to www.AgainstScams.org. The SCARS|RSN website and all of our publications (including social media) are maintained by our own staff employees and volunteers to provide you the most up to date information about scams & scammers from around the world. We show you how to avoid them or recover from them. SCARS is the only registered online crime victims' assistance & support organization in the world. Be sure to report scammers here. Also, visit our main Facebook page for more information about romance scams.

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