SCARS™ Scammer Methods: A Scammer’s Primer – Part 4
A Guide To Help You Better Understand Why Scammers Do What They Do!
Based Upon Actual Scammer Training Guides
The Distance
Scammers Have A Variety Of Guides They Follow To Learn And Expand Their Knowledge Of Scamming
After the early stages of the process, the scammers step up the storytelling and manipulation. This phase is about cementing the feelings and the idea of a relationship.
After their initial phase, they step up the storytelling process to both further create vulnerabilities and begin to maintain control. This is where their manipulation techniques dominate their victims.
In this series, we will be presenting excerpts from such scammer guides to help you recognize common styles and patterns that scammer use on their victims.
The following was designed to scam women, but the same scripts can be applied to men.
Note that you will see considerable Scammer Grammar in these – which we have left as-is for your benefit. This is also just one variation of their storytelling, there are almost as many variations as there are scammers – but you will recognize enough common elements to see their patterns.
From One Of Their Guides – Unedited:
ANOTHER PHASE (ANOTHER CONVICTION OF DISTANCE)
I wish you were here to see how excited i am to received your message, i really felt so good. You are such a nice beautiful woman whom i would like to get to know .. Well, i am just a very caring man and i do really like kids alot because they are God gift from the heaven so parents are to do anything to make them happy and be a very good child,i hope you won`t bother about the distance between us, distance does not matter in a relationship, what really matter most is the HEART and FEELINGS and distance is only there for us to get toknow each other much better before getting to meet each other in person then see how things develop. Well, i really would like to get to know you more and sometimes chat with you then see how things may work out.
By the way, What kind of dates do u prefer??Well as for me i prefer private dates, with my woman and myself alone. I guess i like the private moments when we can share intimate
things. Talk about plans, desires, feelings. As I said before, I’m quite physical. I love to hug and touch and be touched. I love to show affection to my woman and i love it when she’s very affectionate with me. I love women and i always desire to respect them. When i have been with a woman, i have never taken advantage of them unless they do took advantage of me. Even when they want me to be physical with them, I always want only to honor and respect them.When i find the woman who i feel is my soul mate, i look forward to when we can spend time alone, cuddling on the sofa, watching tv/films. Making out, caressing and kissing. I can’t wait to have sex with my future wife. I am a sexual person and i love the thought of being intimate with her in every way. I want a wife who feels the same way. Who has the same sexual appetite as i do and desires to be as intimate as i do. But all of this must be within the context of a relationship. So i will protect the sanctity of my future marriage. It doesn’t matter to me if my future wife has a sexual history. As far as I’m concerned, when we marry we start from fresh. Her past is not of importance to me.Can you tell me more about yourself??????.Well am really looking for a long term and serious relationship,I need a woman that will love me for whom i am,Make me happy again..Am also gonna show in a lot of caring ways in return,Am new on this dating stuff and i really hope i can make som,ething real with you and leave this internet stuff soon….I’m honest, faithful, caring, respectful, responsible and witty. I like having fun and laughing.I like most kinds of music, except rap. I also like to sing karaoke for fun. Other interests include drawing, writing poetry, reading, art, museums,concerts, camping,
hunting and fishing. I don’t watch much TV, but I do like a good happy ending movie now and then, (but not at a walk in theater).I don’t mind getting my hands dirty and do a lot of yardwork and remodeling myself. Will even help work on cars. I don’t care for sports much, but don’t mind if a woman likes them if it doesn’t take much time away from usI don’t like head games, lying, cheating, abusers or fighting. I don’t like being around people who are drug users and those who make a habit of getting drunk. If someone doesn’t have the respect to be faithful to the one they are with, than get rid of them first. There are no excuses for cheating!I believe that just because I think I’m right, doesn’t necessarily make the other person wrong.. Being mean and name calling isn’t part of my life.. I’d rather turn my back on all that drama than live a miserable life. I am not bitter about any past relationships and do not believe in bringing them into a new one What makes you laugh, smile, and cry???? Crazy funny people. Sarcastic people like Dr Cox on Scrubs. I love his character. I love intelligent comedy like political satire. I love Robin Williams, Jim Carey and Mike Myers. They crack me up so much. I love watching those home video clips of kids doing hilarious funny things. Kids make me laugh. The things they say. You never expect it.What makes me cry, I’m always moved when i see scenes on tv between parent and child when they are struggling or dealing with the relationship. my personality type tends toward being outgoing. People would most often describe me energetic, loving,caring, extremely emotional, bubbly, understanding, very supportive, very caring and warm, very passionate and loving,i dont drink nor smoke,i am not into any kind of drugs as well,i like to hang out and have nice time with my partner,I love to bowl, though I haven’t done it in years and shoot pool, play cards, just cruise on a beautiful sunny day,I love the water and one day hope to be blessed to have a home on the water.I love to cook and play video games with my mother and sometimes we swim at the pool in the evening…..and sometimes we ride on our four wheeler..I am a channel surfer,I like csi any cit discovery,tlc anything that has to do with motorcycles.I also like a few reality shows, american idol so you thing you can dance the news sometimes.anything funny or something that will atleast make me smile. I like to smile, it makes me feel better,I am a CSI, Law and Order Special Victims,Criminal Intent and the 4200. I also love Smallville,I like We Were Soldiers,Indepenance Day,Lord of the Rings, All the Mummys, Resident Evil 1 and While you were sleeping, Jerry Maguire, Jumanji, I guess i could keep going but I think I could go on for a while,I enjoy reading. Some of my favorite musicians songs are Chris Tomlin, Dave MatthewsRobert Kelly and Eminem…
i have only been in relationship with Danielle she is dead, i love and she loves me too i really miss her…I am seeking for a long term relationship with Someone special to capture my heart and knows how to handle it with care, one who will cherish me,i am looking for someone to love as well, Capture my heart,Someone kind and affectionate and believe in romance…A real person, who likes themself and is comfortable with who they are, even if not where they are,i am seeking someone who can keep up with me, challenge me and inspire me. And who is intelligent, has ideas, may be creative and has needs and/or expectations to be fullfilled,I am looking for my soulmate to share lifes dreams with, someone who still believes in romance,fun,and is a true gentle woman at heart do you think we are seeking for the samething in a relationship?
i do think that we are seeking for the samething well lets see where it will lead us to……i wanted to get to know you more about you that was the reason i messaged you,i am not a guy that use and dump women no no no i am a very faithful and Godly man,i know how to handle my woman heart and keep it safe in other not to miss it,so i know how to handle my woman just the way people handle Golds and fragile items,i expect what i give out to my woman in return
Now the scammer is solidifying the relationship!
These are directly from one of their guide books that they copy and paste in messages to new prospect victims.
The above was unedited. We did not change the grammar or the punction – bad though it is. You can see it is full of scammer grammar!
You will notice that it is full of local (African) phrasing and terms. If you look carefully you can spot them, with lots of Scammer Grammar.
The major issue you will notice in this is how the questions are designed to “groom” the victim into specific directions – trusting the scammer, the scammer’s interest in business deals, and violating that trust. This helps set the stage for the scammer to leverage that grooming process with Amygdala Hijacks, and the full-scale gaslighting-style manipulation and control.
If you are not a native English speaker you would not notice the odd phrasing of many of these questions.
Keep an eye out for any of these, assuming you are still talking to strangers! Just remember, that ANYONE that contacts you directly that you do not know or have a prior affiliation with is going to be a scammer!
TAGS: SCARS, Information About Scams, Anti-Scam, Scams, Scammers, Fraudsters, Cybercrime, Crybercriminals, Romance Scams, Scam Victims, Online Fraud, Online Crime Is Real Crime, Scam Avoidance, A Scammer’s Primer, Scammer Manipulation Process, Scammer Methods & Techniques, Scammer Prepared Scripts, Scammer Questions, Scammer Training Guides, Scammer Methods, The Love Story
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By the SCARS™ Editorial Team
Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc.
A Worldwide Crime Victims Assistance & Crime Prevention Nonprofit Organization Headquartered In Miami Florida USA & Monterrey NL Mexico, with Partners In More Than 60 Countries
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Table of Contents
- A Guide To Help You Better Understand Why Scammers Do What They Do!
- Scammers Have A Variety Of Guides They Follow To Learn And Expand Their Knowledge Of Scamming
- From One Of Their Guides – Unedited:
- Now the scammer is solidifying the relationship!
- PLEASE SHARE OUR ARTICLES WITH YOUR FRIENDS & FAMILY
- By the SCARS™ Editorial Team
Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc.
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ARTICLE META
Important Information for New Scam Victims
- Please visit www.ScamVictimsSupport.org – a SCARS Website for New Scam Victims & Sextortion Victims
- Enroll in FREE SCARS Scam Survivor’s School now at www.SCARSeducation.org
- Please visit www.ScamPsychology.org – to more fully understand the psychological concepts involved in scams and scam victim recovery
If you are looking for local trauma counselors please visit counseling.AgainstScams.org or join SCARS for our counseling/therapy benefit: membership.AgainstScams.org
If you need to speak with someone now, you can dial 988 or find phone numbers for crisis hotlines all around the world here: www.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines
A Note About Labeling!
We often use the term ‘scam victim’ in our articles, but this is a convenience to help those searching for information in search engines like Google. It is just a convenience and has no deeper meaning. If you have come through such an experience, YOU are a Survivor! It was not your fault. You are not alone! Axios!
A Question of Trust
At the SCARS Institute, we invite you to do your own research on the topics we speak about and publish, Our team investigates the subject being discussed, especially when it comes to understanding the scam victims-survivors experience. You can do Google searches but in many cases, you will have to wade through scientific papers and studies. However, remember that biases and perspectives matter and influence the outcome. Regardless, we encourage you to explore these topics as thoroughly as you can for your own awareness.
Statement About Victim Blaming
Some of our articles discuss various aspects of victims. This is both about better understanding victims (the science of victimology) and their behaviors and psychology. This helps us to educate victims/survivors about why these crimes happened and to not blame themselves, better develop recovery programs, and to help victims avoid scams in the future. At times this may sound like blaming the victim, but it does not blame scam victims, we are simply explaining the hows and whys of the experience victims have.
These articles, about the Psychology of Scams or Victim Psychology – meaning that all humans have psychological or cognitive characteristics in common that can either be exploited or work against us – help us all to understand the unique challenges victims face before, during, and after scams, fraud, or cybercrimes. These sometimes talk about some of the vulnerabilities the scammers exploit. Victims rarely have control of them or are even aware of them, until something like a scam happens and then they can learn how their mind works and how to overcome these mechanisms.
Articles like these help victims and others understand these processes and how to help prevent them from being exploited again or to help them recover more easily by understanding their post-scam behaviors. Learn more about the Psychology of Scams at www.ScamPsychology.org
Psychology Disclaimer:
All articles about psychology and the human brain on this website are for information & education only
The information provided in this article is intended for educational and self-help purposes only and should not be construed as a substitute for professional therapy or counseling.
While any self-help techniques outlined herein may be beneficial for scam victims seeking to recover from their experience and move towards recovery, it is important to consult with a qualified mental health professional before initiating any course of action. Each individual’s experience and needs are unique, and what works for one person may not be suitable for another.
Additionally, any approach may not be appropriate for individuals with certain pre-existing mental health conditions or trauma histories. It is advisable to seek guidance from a licensed therapist or counselor who can provide personalized support, guidance, and treatment tailored to your specific needs.
If you are experiencing significant distress or emotional difficulties related to a scam or other traumatic event, please consult your doctor or mental health provider for appropriate care and support.
Also read our SCARS Institute Statement about Professional Care for Scam Victims – click here to go to our ScamsNOW.com website.











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