
SCARS Institute’s Encyclopedia of Scams™ Published Continuously for 25 Years

SCARS™ Scammer Methods: A Scammer’s Primer – Part 5
A Guide To Help You Better Understand Why Scammers Do What They Do!
Based Upon Actual Scammer Training Guides
The Love Story
Scammers Have A Variety Of Guides They Follow To Learn And Expand Their Knowledge Of Scamming
After the early stages of the process, the scammers step up the storytelling and manipulation. This phase is about cementing the feelings and the idea of a relationship.
After their initial phase, they step up the storytelling process to both further create vulnerabilities and begin to maintain control. This is where their manipulation techniques dominate their victims.
In this series, we will be presenting excerpts from such scammer guides to help you recognize common styles and patterns that scammer use on their victims.
The following was designed to scam women, but the same scripts can be applied to men.
Note that you will see considerable Scammer Grammar in these – which we have left as-is for your benefit. This is also just one variation of their storytelling, there are almost as many variations as there are scammers – but you will recognize enough common elements to see their patterns.
From One Of Their Guides – Unedited:
Love tales
Hey Beautiful, I just wanted to do something simple to say I love you and to put that smile I love so much back on your face. I want everyone to know how much you mean to me. Ever since you have entered my life, I’ve been flying on Cloud 9 and I have not come down yet.I miss you all the time. I can’t bear to ‘be’ without you. Sometimes when we don’t talk for long I find that painful, then when we do talk I find that painful too cos I know how much am gonna miss u when you leave.
I tell you this everyday, but you are the most beautiful person I know, inside and out and I see that more clearly with each passing day. I love everything about you, about us. You do something to me that no other has, you have made me so happy, the happiest I’ve ever been. You give me the most amazing feelings inside, the feeling of being in love with you.
I still don’t know what I did to be so lucky to have you in my life, my dream come true… I am so thankful though. In this short time that we’ve been together, we have grown so much and I can’t wait to see what the future holds for us. Am falling in love with you barbara, with all my heart and soul, always and forever!baby I can’t stand not being with you and and you being so far away. I’ve been struggling with this for so long baby. I want u to know that you are with me’ always, my thoughts are on you constantly baby and that will never change. Baby am in love with you so deep. Am desperate to feel your arms around me’ baby. You are my sweet baby Girl, just need you to know how much I care. Missing you and loving you always xoxoxoxoxo
The Above Serves The Purpose Of Finalizing The Set Of Hormonal Releases That Achieves Emotional Control Over The Victim
In addition, the scammer will use photos and videos to further reinforce the emotional flood. Each video serves its purpose, but of course, there will be many more than just these. You will notice how simplistic and juvenile they are, but if the victim is properly pre-conditioned it will not matter.
Love VIDs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GjjAyN1psXk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jsPxjJDRIGE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ckZQ-9u_WJ4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ibi3378ijTM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNJA4wDr5sY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CCV8VUCMUR4
Now The Scammer Is Solidly In Control The Relationship!
After this comes the tale of the emergency or tragedy that will require money. While that is going on, the scammer will continue to throw romance at the victim like a firefighter putting out a fire – except in this case he is burning down the house with it.
Of course, Gaslighting will continue also – trying to isolate the victim from family and friends to prevent any doubts.
These are directly from one of their guide books that they copy and paste in messages to new prospect victims.
The above was unedited. We did not change the grammar or the punction – bad though it is. You can see it is full of scammer grammar!
You will notice that it is full of local (African) phrasing and terms. If you look carefully you can spot them, with lots of Scammer Grammar.
The major issue you will notice in this is how the questions are designed to “groom” the victim into specific directions – trusting the scammer, the scammer’s interest in business deals, and violating that trust. This helps set the stage for the scammer to leverage that grooming process with Amygdala Hijacks, and the full-scale gaslighting-style manipulation and control.
If you are not a native English speaker you would not notice the odd phrasing of many of these questions.
Keep an eye out for any of these, assuming you are still talking to strangers! Just remember, that ANYONE that contacts you directly that you do not know or have a prior affiliation with is going to be a scammer!
TAGS: SCARS, Information About Scams, Anti-Scam, Scams, Scammers, Fraudsters, Cybercrime, Crybercriminals, Romance Scams, Scam Victims, Online Fraud, Online Crime Is Real Crime, Scam Avoidance, A Scammer’s Primer, Scammer Manipulation Process, Scammer Methods & Techniques, Scammer Prepared Scripts, Scammer Questions, Scammer Training Guides, Scammer Methods, The Love Story
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By the SCARS™ Editorial Team
Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc.
A Worldwide Crime Victims Assistance & Crime Prevention Nonprofit Organization Headquartered In Miami Florida USA & Monterrey NL Mexico, with Partners In More Than 60 Countries
To Learn More, Volunteer, or Donate Visit: www.AgainstScams.org
Contact Us: Contact@AgainstScams.org
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Table of Contents
- A Guide To Help You Better Understand Why Scammers Do What They Do!
- Scammers Have A Variety Of Guides They Follow To Learn And Expand Their Knowledge Of Scamming
- From One Of Their Guides – Unedited:
- The Above Serves The Purpose Of Finalizing The Set Of Hormonal Releases That Achieves Emotional Control Over The Victim
- Now The Scammer Is Solidly In Control The Relationship!
- PLEASE SHARE OUR ARTICLES WITH YOUR FRIENDS & FAMILY
- By the SCARS™ Editorial Team
Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc.
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ARTICLE META
Important Information for New Scam Victims
- Please visit www.ScamVictimsSupport.org – a SCARS Website for New Scam Victims & Sextortion Victims
- Enroll in FREE SCARS Scam Survivor’s School now at www.SCARSeducation.org
- Please visit www.ScamPsychology.org – to more fully understand the psychological concepts involved in scams and scam victim recovery
If you are looking for local trauma counselors please visit counseling.AgainstScams.org or join SCARS for our counseling/therapy benefit: membership.AgainstScams.org
If you need to speak with someone now, you can dial 988 or find phone numbers for crisis hotlines all around the world here: www.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines
A Note About Labeling!
We often use the term ‘scam victim’ in our articles, but this is a convenience to help those searching for information in search engines like Google. It is just a convenience and has no deeper meaning. If you have come through such an experience, YOU are a Survivor! It was not your fault. You are not alone! Axios!
A Question of Trust
At the SCARS Institute, we invite you to do your own research on the topics we speak about and publish, Our team investigates the subject being discussed, especially when it comes to understanding the scam victims-survivors experience. You can do Google searches but in many cases, you will have to wade through scientific papers and studies. However, remember that biases and perspectives matter and influence the outcome. Regardless, we encourage you to explore these topics as thoroughly as you can for your own awareness.
Statement About Victim Blaming
SCARS Institute articles examine different aspects of the scam victim experience, as well as those who may have been secondary victims. This work focuses on understanding victimization through the science of victimology, including common psychological and behavioral responses. The purpose is to help victims and survivors understand why these crimes occurred, reduce shame and self-blame, strengthen recovery programs and victim opportunities, and lower the risk of future victimization.
At times, these discussions may sound uncomfortable, overwhelming, or may be mistaken for blame. They are not. Scam victims are never blamed. Our goal is to explain the mechanisms of deception and the human responses that scammers exploit, and the processes that occur after the scam ends, so victims can better understand what happened to them and why it felt convincing at the time, and what the path looks like going forward.
Articles that address the psychology, neurology, physiology, and other characteristics of scams and the victim experience recognize that all people share cognitive and emotional traits that can be manipulated under the right conditions. These characteristics are not flaws. They are normal human functions that criminals deliberately exploit. Victims typically have little awareness of these mechanisms while a scam is unfolding and a very limited ability to control them. Awareness often comes only after the harm has occurred.
By explaining these processes, these articles help victims make sense of their experiences, understand common post-scam reactions, and identify ways to protect themselves moving forward. This knowledge supports recovery by replacing confusion and self-blame with clarity, context, and self-compassion.
Additional educational material on these topics is available at ScamPsychology.org – ScamsNOW.com and other SCARS Institute websites.
Psychology Disclaimer:
All articles about psychology and the human brain on this website are for information & education only
The information provided in this article is intended for educational and self-help purposes only and should not be construed as a substitute for professional therapy or counseling.
While any self-help techniques outlined herein may be beneficial for scam victims seeking to recover from their experience and move towards recovery, it is important to consult with a qualified mental health professional before initiating any course of action. Each individual’s experience and needs are unique, and what works for one person may not be suitable for another.
Additionally, any approach may not be appropriate for individuals with certain pre-existing mental health conditions or trauma histories. It is advisable to seek guidance from a licensed therapist or counselor who can provide personalized support, guidance, and treatment tailored to your specific needs.
If you are experiencing significant distress or emotional difficulties related to a scam or other traumatic event, please consult your doctor or mental health provider for appropriate care and support.
Also read our SCARS Institute Statement about Professional Care for Scam Victims – click here to go to our ScamsNOW.com website.








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