Hindsight is 20/20
I wanted to share how I now feel about the scammers and some things I have learned from this experience.
Hindsight is 20/20, when we can finally see the whole picture and not just the snippets we saw in a moment, that’s when the true pain takes hold.
The scammers are full of so much drama, each day brings a new crisis. All we can see at the time was that snapshot in that moment.
Reporting the scammers is where I began to have some peace of mind and control. I learned to place the blame Blame or Blaming is the act of censuring, holding responsible, making negative statements about an individual or group that their action or actions are socially or morally irresponsible, the opposite of praise. When someone is morally responsible for doing something wrong, their action is blameworthy. By contrast, when someone is morally responsible for doing something right, we may say that his or her action is praiseworthy. Blame imparts responsibility for an action or act, as in that they made a choice to perform that act or action. where it belongs – on the scammers.
Upon reflection I know there were red flags, I had gut feelings something was not quite right but the scammers had me brainwashed, they know how to control and manipulate people. I ignored the little voice in my head.
Control is their job.
They always have an answer ready, always keeping us off balance, and at all costs, they need to keep that illusion alive.
When we “wake up” so to speak. We are left to figure out how to survive the aftermath of such a gut-wrenching experience.
Picturing your future life was not crazy, I was picturing mine too. They paint a beautiful picture for us to buy into.
The scammers find our vulnerabilities and feed them to get their way. They really do live in our heads.
Ghandi said “do not let anyone walk through your mind with dirty feet,” yet they did as these monsters lived in our heads. I didn’t know I could buy into such a master manipulation.
Know your heart will begin to heal.
And always remember we heal one day at a time,
sometimes one hour at a time,
sometimes one minute at a time.
Healing is different for all of us, we mourn the illusion and learn to let it go as if a loved one has died. We bury the ghost. We hold onto our faith and learn to fill the emotional void productively, with friends, family, and our faith. We go through stages of guilt, anger Anger, also known as wrath or rage, is an intense emotional state involving a strong uncomfortable and non-cooperative response to a perceived provocation, trigger, hurt or threat. About one-third of scam victims become trapped in anger for extended periods of time following a scam.
A person experiencing anger will often experience physical effects, such as increased heart rate, elevated blood pressure, and increased levels of adrenaline and noradrenaline. Some view anger as an emotion that triggers a part of the fight or flight response. Anger becomes the predominant feeling behaviorally, cognitively, and physiologically.
Anger can have many physical and mental consequences. While most of those who experience anger explain its arousal as a result of "what has happened to them", psychologists point out that an angry person can very well be mistaken because anger causes a loss in self-monitoring capacity and objective observability., blame, resentment and we learn to make adjustments
As we deprogram ourselves we do learn to refind our joy. It takes time. The waiting can be excruciating as we are in so much pain.
SCARS has given us a platform to purge, vent, and find support without judgment.
As we share our stories and comment because we are here for ” each one to teach one”.