RSN™ Insight: Good vs. Bad While Recovering6 min read

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Updated on November 3, 2018 by SCARS|RSN Romance Scams Now Editorial Team

RSN™ Insight: Good vs. Bad While Recovering

After The Scam Many Victims Choose To Recover – Sadly, Most Do Not!

Only about 30% of victims will choose to recover from the scam emotionally, the remaining victims will either hide in their denial or allow anger to run their lives.

Even those that have chosen to recover face constant challenges and consequences of continuing bad behaviors.

However, to help victims learn to recover we have to be clear about what is positive behavior vs. negative behavior!

What are positive behaviors? What are negative behaviors?

Especially in the context of a scam victims’ recovery?

Positive behavior is changing the behaviors and attitudes that got you scammed!

A major part of recovering is about avoiding scams & scammers. It is about not letting yourself be put in situations where you have to make a judgment call about whether something is safe or not. Because that did not work so well the last time.

It is preventing or not allowing yourself contact with your past temptations, because MOST victims will be scammed more than once.

Negative behavior is repeating dangerous behaviors and being overconfident!

It is trusting your attitude and determination alone. It is thinking that just because you believe you can’t be scammed again that you will not. That attitude will fail you again and again.

One of the worst negative behaviors is that you continue to allow access to strangers. It is about reading the messages they send you. It is responding when they do. These are not good things.

EVERYONE SAYS NEVER AGAIN

But After 27 Years We Know It Is Not True

88% of alcoholics relapse. Only 12% successfully recover. It is about the same for drug addicts. It is not about wanting to recover, it is about preventing their recovery with continued dangerous behavior.

Resisting a scammer is better than nothing, but by putting yourself in that position over and over you run the risk of being scammed again. Scammers are not so much smart as they are relentless.

There are thousands of different approaches, and once they know you will not fall for one approach they will try others.

AND THEY WILL TRY OVER AND OVER BECAUSE THE ODDS ARE IN THEIR FAVOR NOT YOURS.

They already know that you are susceptible to being scammed. In that regard you are like an addict, an addict is an addict for life. A scam victim remains a scam victim until they learn to not be one, and even then you can still be scammed.

YOU have to admit to yourself that you were scammed and you can be again. Everyone is scammed on some level all the time – when you buy a product and then get it and ask yourself what you were thinking? – you were scammed. There are countless examples of things we buy or do or say where we did not think it through and it turned out to be false – these were scams of one kind or another.

You Have To Acknowledge That You Do Not Know What Is A Scam All The Time

Yes, maybe you can now recognize some scams now but certainly not all or even most.

The first thing you must understand is you cannot think your way out of scans. You have to change your behavior to prevent it or at least reduce the risk. Avoiding scams is the best way to not be scammed.

Avoiding all contact with strangers is the most important element in your defense.

Do not allow yourself to talk with a stranger and nothing will happening, because if you keep talking with them eventually it will.

This Is About The Numbers – The Average Victim Is Scammed Nearly Three Times!

Think about that – average – that means some are scammed once and some are scammed many many times. What is the difference between them? Eliminating risk in their lives and not relying on intellectual thought. Any security expert will tell you that safe habits make more of a difference than being smart.

Also, 70% of victims never recover from scams. They either remain in denial and stay emotionally broken or they let anger rule their lives.

Are you in the 70%?

The way you know is if you work at your recovery and learn to not allow yourself to become a victim again. It is not attitude, it is actions.

Each event is a potential lesson. That is the point of this website and our support groups and the recovery process itself so that each person can learn from each other.

As much as support groups are a social group it is also a recovery group and there are hard truths and lessons to be learned. The foundation of why join a real support group is to recover and we will do what we can to help that become a reality for each person in our support groups. But remember that most groups online are amateurs and incompetent. We are a registered professional crime victims’ assistance and support organization, and one of only 3 or 4 in the world. If you want to join one of our support groups just let us know.

But For Now! Stop Talking To Strangers. Period!

RSN^™ Team
a division of SCARS^™
Miami Florida U.S.A.

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Tell us about your experiences with Romance Scammers in our Scams Discussion Forum on Facebook »

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FAQ: How Do You Properly Report Scammers?

It is essential that law enforcement knows about scams & scammers, even though there is nothing (in most cases) that they can do.

Always report scams involving money lost or where you received money to:

Local Police – ask them to take an “informational” police report – say you need it for your insurance
Your National Police or FBI (www.IC3.gov)
The Scars Worldwide Reporting Network HERE or on www.Anyscam.com

This helps your government understand the problem, and allows law enforcement to add scammers on watch lists worldwide.

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Visit our NEW Main RSN Facebook page for much more information about scams and online crime: www.facebook.com/RSN.Main.News.And.Inromation.Home.Page

To learn more about SCARS visit www.AgainstRomanceScams.org

Please be sure to report all scammers HERE or on www.Anyscam.com

All original content is Copyright © 1991 – 2018 SCARS All Rights Reserved Worldwide & Webwide – RSN/Romance Scams Now & SCARS/Society of Citizens Against Romance Scams are all trademarks of Society of Citizens Against Romance Scams Inc.

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SCARS|RSN Romance Scams Now Editorial Team

Romance Scams Avoidance Education & Scam Victims' Assistance & Support Organization at SCARS|RSN™ Romance Scams Now™ is a division of the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams™ [SCARS]

SCARS|RSN™ RomanceScamsNow.com™ is the official knowledge and victims' support publication of the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams™ Incorporated [SCARS]™ It is edited and published by the SCARS|RSN Team, a division of SCARS. SCARS is the world's leading anti-scam charitable nonprofit nongovernmental organization, based in Miami Florida U.S.A. Its founder has been involved in combating online fraud since 1991. SCARS™ - the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc. is a charitable nonprofit nongovernmental organization (NGO) dedicated to advocating victim's causes and changing government and law enforcement attitudes toward online fraud for good! Please join us in becoming a member of SCARS - it's free! Add your voice so that the world will listen at last - just go to www.AgainstScams.org. The SCARS|RSN website and all of our publications (including social media) are maintained by our own staff employees and volunteers to provide you the most up to date information about scams & scammers from around the world. We show you how to avoid them or recover from them. SCARS is the only registered online crime victims' assistance & support organization in the world. Be sure to report scammers here. Also, visit our main Facebook page for more information about romance scams.