The Face In The Photo Is Not The Scammer: Scam Victims Leave The Real Person Alone! – [UPDATED 2023]

The Face In The Photo Is Not The Scammer

Scam Victims Leave The Real Person Alone!

Recovery Psychology – A SCARS Insight

The Face In The Photo Is Not The Person(s) That Scammed You

The Scammers That Engage In These Crime Steal Thousands Of Identities

Please Leave The Real Person Alone!

We are constantly asked by victims to identify the person in the photo that they fell in love with

Scam victims commonly want to save them by telling them that their photos are being used, telling them how they feel, or telling them their photo is being used by scammers.

Trust us, they already know their photos have been stolen by scammers!

Please Understand This!

For romance scam victims, the emotional pull to contact the person in the stolen photos used by the scammer can be incredibly strong. However, doing so can be detrimental for several reasons:

1. Further Emotional Harm to YOU:

  • Reopening Emotional Wounds: Victims are often emotionally vulnerable and seeking closure. Contacting the person in the stolen photos may reopen wounds, reviving feelings of betrayal, embarrassment, and emotional trauma from the scam.
  • Disruption of Healing: Victims are in the process of healing and moving on from the scam. Reaching out to the individual in the photos might disrupt this process, causing additional confusion and emotional distress.
  • False Hope: Contacting the real person often leads to disappointment and even further heartache. The individual likely is aware that their photos are being used, but knows nothing about your scam and cannot help you. This can shatter the victim’s remaining hope and exacerbate feelings of betrayal.
  • Deeper Emotional Investment: Engaging with the real person, even through brief interactions, can deepen the victim’s emotional attachment to the fabricated persona created by the scammer. This can make moving on and healing even more challenging.

2. Real Identity vs. Scammer’s Fiction:

  • Understanding the Reality: Victims often believe the scammer’s false narrative about the person in the stolen photos. However, contacting the actual individual reveals the truth, shattering the fabricated story created by the scammer.
  • Potential Confusion and Misunderstanding: The person in the photos is an innocent victim of identity theft. They have no connection to the scam. Attempting to involve them in the situation might lead to confusion, misunderstanding, and discomfort for the innocent party.

3. Increased Risk of Victimization:

  • Scammers Exploit Vulnerability: Scam artists are adept at manipulating emotions. Reaching out to the real person might alert the scammer to the victim’s emotional state, making them vulnerable to further manipulation or even threats.
  • Potential Legal or Security Risks: Trying to track down the person in the photos might involve engaging in online activities that could expose the victim to additional security risks or even legal issues – technically when the victim tracks down the person in the photos is engaged in cyberstalking.

4. Unwanted Contact for the Unwitting Photo Subject:

  • Privacy Violation: Reaching out to the real person can be a significant intrusion into their privacy. They may feel harassed or even traumatized by being involved in the scam without their consent.
  • Emotional Burden: The real person might already be dealing with their own struggles and may not have the emotional bandwidth to support a grieving scam victim.

5. Legal and Ethical Implications:

  • Privacy Violation: Reaching out to the person in the photos can intrude upon their privacy and personal space, causing unintended distress to someone who has no involvement in the scam.
  • Possible Legal Ramifications: In some cases, attempting to contact the person in the stolen photos can have legal implications related to harassment, privacy breaches, cyberstalking, or defamation, potentially complicating the victim’s situation further.

This is going to Sound Harsh

But you have to remember that if you try to track them down and contact them you can be doing real harm to another victim and their family.

Remember, that Face is Fake!

It is not a person – it is a fabrication. It is a lie and a fraud.

We understand that you are fixated on that face, but the real person is a victim too, and does not want to hear from anyone.

Almost all of the time, the person in the photo already knows they are being used by scammers because they are constantly contacted by people claiming to be in love with them, or wanting them to know all about their scam experience.

The Impersonation Victim

They do Not Want to Hear from You, because they are also a Victim

Anyone that does not accept this, and tries to contact the person pictured is causing just as much harm as the scammer. The people who have been impersonated do not want to hear from other victims. Their lives have been ruined by the scammer as much as yours has. All you will be doing is driving home how they have lost control of their face or their identity, causing more trauma in the process.

They want to be left alone. Some of them are hounded by victims constantly telling them how much they love them. Some get multiple calls a day about this.

You Don’t Know that Person – You have just seen Their Photo

While this sounds harsh and brutal, it is a reality of romance scams. You fall in love with a stolen photo from a real person and proceed to develop a fantasy relationship with them.

  • In reality, you were lied to by the person or scam team hiding behind the photo.
  • You have to accept this and move on. Focus only on yourself and your own recovery. Obsessing on the face in the photo is a path to obsession and madness.
  • You need to get over the scam, you cannot help anyone else at this stage. You need to focus on your own recovery and forget that face – hard as that is.
  • Additionally, obsessing about the face (and the real person behind it) can be considered cyberstalking, which is a crime in itself, so don’t go there.

It Doesn’t Matter Who He or She is, His or Her Photo was Stolen by Scammers

You have to understand that you do not have a relationship with a real person. They really do not want to hear from you. Hundreds of thousands of victims invade their lives. Can you imagine what it is like to have so many people stalk them or track them down and try to inject themselves into their life?

Accept that You were Scammed

  • Accept that there was no relationship
  • Accept that everything was a lie
  • Accept the pain and use it to recover
  • Accept that you will make it through this
  • Accept that it just takes time

Just don’t make it worse by tracking down another poor soul and making their life miserable in the process.

Alternative ways to cope with the emotional aftermath of a romance scam:

  • Focus on Self-Care: Prioritize activities that nurture your well-being and emotional recovery, like spending time with loved ones, engaging in hobbies, or seeking professional help.
  • Connect with Supportive Communities: Connect with other scam victims through SCARS online support groups or through trauma counseling.
  • Remember the Scammer’s Deception: Remind yourself that the person in the photos was not involved in the scam and deserves their privacy. The true perpetrators are the scammers who deliberately deceived you.

Remember, the person in the photos is an unwitting victim just like you. Reaching out might not bring the closure you seek and could potentially cause further harm to both yourself and the person whose identity was stolen. Focus on your healing journey and seek support from trusted sources who can help you navigate this difficult experience.

The face in the photo is a victim too - please leave them alone!

SCARS Resources:

Other Cyber Resources

-/ 30 /-

What do you think about this?
Please share your thoughts in a comment below!

Statement About Victim Blaming

Some of our articles discuss various aspects of victims. This is both about better understanding victims (the science of victimology) and their behaviors and psychology. This helps us to educate victims/survivors about why these crimes happened and to not blame themselves, better develop recovery programs, and to help victims avoid scams in the future. At times this may sound like blaming the victim, but it does not blame scam victims, we are simply explaining the hows and whys of the experience victims have.

These articles, about the Psychology of Scams or Victim Psychology – meaning that all humans have psychological or cognitive characteristics in common that can either be exploited or work against us – help us all to understand the unique challenges victims face before, during, and after scams, fraud, or cybercrimes. These sometimes talk about some of the vulnerabilities the scammers exploit. Victims rarely have control of them or are even aware of them, until something like a scam happens and then they can learn how their mind works and how to overcome these mechanisms.

Articles like these help victims and others understand these processes and how to help prevent them from being exploited again or to help them recover more easily by understanding their post-scam behaviors. Learn more about the Psychology of Scams at

SCARS FREE Support & Recovery Program - 4 EVER FREE

Do You Need Support?
Get It Now!

SCARS provides the leading Support & Recovery program for relationship scam victims – completely FREE!

Our managed peer support groups allow victims to talk to other survivors and recover in the most experienced environment possible, for as long as they need. Recovery takes as long as it takes – we put no limits on our support!

SCARS is the most trusted support & education provider in the world. Our team is certified in trauma-informed care, grief counseling, and so much more!

To apply to join our groups visit

We also offer separate support groups for family & friends too.

SCARS STAR Membership

Become a

SCARS offers memberships in our STAR program, which includes many benefits for a very low annual membership fee!

SCARS STAR Membership benefits include:

  • FREE Counseling or Therapy Benefit from our partner
  • Exclusive members-only content & publications
  • Discounts on SCARS Self-Help Books Save
  • And more!

To learn more about the SCARS STAR Membership visit

To become a SCARS STAR Member right now visit

SCARS Publishing Self-Help Recovery Books Available At

Scam Victim Self-Help Do-It-Yourself Recovery Books

SCARS Printed Books For Every Scam Survivor From SCARS Publishing


Each is based on our SCARS Team’s 32-plus years of experience.

SCARS Website Visitors receive an Extra 10% Discount
Use Discount Code “romanacescamsnow” at Checkout



Legal Disclaimer:

The content provided on this platform regarding psychological topics is intended solely for educational and entertainment purposes. The publisher makes no representations or warranties regarding the accuracy or completeness of the information presented. The content is designed to raise awareness about various psychological subjects, and readers are strongly encouraged to conduct their own research and verify information independently.

The information presented does not constitute professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment of any psychological disorder or disease. It is not a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Readers are advised to seek the guidance of a licensed medical professional for any questions or concerns related to their mental health.

The publisher disclaims any responsibility for actions taken or not taken based on the content provided. The treatment of psychological issues is a serious matter, and readers should consult with qualified professionals to address their specific circumstances. The content on this platform is not intended to create, and receipt of it does not constitute, a therapist-client relationship.

Interpretation and Definitions


For the purposes of this Disclaimer:

  • Company (referred to as either “the Company”, “We”, “Us” or “Our” in this Disclaimer) refers to Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc. (registered d.b.a. “SCARS”,) 9561 Fountainbleau Blvd., Suit 602, Miami FL 33172.
  • Service refers to the Website.
  • You means the individual accessing this website, or the company, or other legal entity on behalf of which such individual is accessing or using the Service, as applicable.
  • Website refers to, accessible from

Website Disclaimer

The information contained on this website is for general information purposes only.

The Company assumes no responsibility for errors or omissions in the contents of the Service.

In no event shall the Company be liable for any special, direct, indirect, consequential, or incidental damages or any damages whatsoever, whether in an action of contract, negligence or other tort, arising out of or in connection with the use of the Service or the contents of the Service. The Company reserves the right to make additions, deletions, or modifications to the contents on the Service at any time without prior notice.

The Company does not warrant this website in any way.

External Links Disclaimer

This website may contain links to external websites that are not provided or maintained by or in any way affiliated with the Company.

Please note that the Company does not guarantee the accuracy, relevance, timeliness, or completeness of any information on these external websites.

Errors and Omissions Disclaimer

The information given by SCARS is for general guidance on matters of interest only. Even if the Company takes every precaution to ensure that the content of this website is both current and accurate, errors can occur. Plus, given the changing nature of laws, rules, and regulations, there may be delays, omissions, or inaccuracies in the information contained on this website.

SCARS is not responsible for any errors or omissions, or for the results obtained from the use of this information.

Fair Use Disclaimer

SCARS may use copyrighted material that has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. The Company is making such material available for criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research.

The Company believes this constitutes a “fair use” of any such copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the United States Copyright law.

If You wish to use copyrighted material from this website for your own purposes that go beyond fair use, You must obtain permission from the copyright owner.

Views Expressed Disclaimer

The Service may contain views and opinions which are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of any other author, agency, organization, employer, or company, including SCARS.

Comments published by users are their sole responsibility and the users will take full responsibility, liability, and blame for any libel or litigation that results from something written in or as a direct result of something written in a comment. The Company is not liable for any comment published by users and reserves the right to delete any comment for any reason whatsoever.

No Responsibility Disclaimer

The information on the Service is provided with the understanding that the Company is not herein engaged in rendering legal, accounting, tax, medical or mental health, or other professional advice and services. As such, it should not be used as a substitute for consultation with professional accounting, tax, legal, medical or mental health, or other competent advisers.

In no event shall the Company, its team, board of directors, volunteers, or its suppliers be liable for any special, incidental, indirect, or consequential damages whatsoever arising out of or in connection with your access or use or inability to access or use the Service.

“Use at Your Own Risk” Disclaimer

All information on this website is provided “as is”, with no guarantee of completeness, accuracy, timeliness or of the results obtained from the use of this information, and without warranty of any kind, express or implied, including, but not limited to warranties of performance, merchantability, and fitness for a particular purpose.

SCARS will not be liable to You or anyone else for any decision made or action taken in reliance on the information given by the Service or for any consequential, special, or similar damages, even if advised of the possibility of such damages.

Contact Us

If you have any questions about this Disclaimer, You can contact Us:

  • By email:

PLEASE NOTE: Psychology Clarification

The following specific modalities within the practice of psychology are restricted to psychologists appropriately trained in the use of such modalities:

  • Diagnosis: The diagnosis of mental, emotional, or brain disorders and related behaviors.
  • Psychoanalysis: Psychoanalysis is a type of therapy that focuses on helping individuals to understand and resolve unconscious conflicts.
  • Hypnosis: Hypnosis is a state of trance in which individuals are more susceptible to suggestion. It can be used to treat a variety of conditions, including anxiety, depression, and pain.
  • Biofeedback: Biofeedback is a type of therapy that teaches individuals to control their bodily functions, such as heart rate and blood pressure. It can be used to treat a variety of conditions, including stress, anxiety, and pain.
  • Behavioral analysis: Behavioral analysis is a type of therapy that focuses on changing individuals’ behaviors. It is often used to treat conditions such as autism and ADHD.
    Neuropsychology: Neuropsychology is a type of psychology that focuses on the relationship between the brain and behavior. It is often used to assess and treat cognitive impairments caused by brain injuries or diseases.

SCARS and the members of the SCARS Team do not engage in any of the above modalities in relationship to scam victims. SCARS is not a mental healthcare provider and recognizes the importance of professionalism and separation between its work and that of the licensed practice of psychology.

SCARS is an educational provider of generalized self-help information that individuals can use for their own benefit to achieve their own goals related to emotional trauma. SCARS recommends that all scam victims see professional counselors or therapists to help them determine the suitability of any specific information or practices that may help them.

SCARS cannot diagnose or treat any individuals, nor can it state the effectiveness of any educational information that it may provide, regardless of its experience in interacting with traumatized scam victims over time. All information that SCARS provides is purely for general educational purposes to help scam victims become aware of and better understand the topics and to be able to dialog with their counselors or therapists.

It is important that all readers understand these distinctions and that they apply the information that SCARS may publish at their own risk, and should do so only after consulting a licensed psychologist or mental healthcare provider.






This content and other material contained on the website, apps, newsletter, and products (“Content”), is general in nature and for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical, legal, or financial advice; the Content is not intended to be a substitute for licensed or regulated professional advice. Always consult your doctor or other qualified healthcare provider, lawyer, financial, or tax professional with any questions you may have regarding the educational information contained herein. SCARS makes no guarantees about the efficacy of information described on or in SCARS’ Content. The information contained is subject to change and is not intended to cover all possible situations or effects. SCARS does not recommend or endorse any specific professional or care provider, product, service, or other information that may be mentioned in SCARS’ websites, apps, and Content unless explicitly identified as such.

The disclaimers herein are provided on this page for ease of reference. These disclaimers supplement and are a part of SCARS’ website’s Terms of Use. 

All original content is Copyright © 1991 – 2023 Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc. (Registered D.B.A SCARS) All Rights Reserved Worldwide & Webwide. Third-party copyrights acknowledge.

U.S. State of Florida Registration Nonprofit (Not for Profit) #N20000011978 [SCARS DBA Registered #G20000137918] – Learn more at

View the claimed and or registered indicia, service marks, and trademarks of Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc., All Rights Reserved Worldwide

Contact the law firm for the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Incorporated by email at

Share This Information - Choose Your Social Media!


  1. Corey Gale July 17, 2024 at 12:02 pm - Reply

    This is a hard one to accept after seeing so many photos matching the story I was being told. However I was probably just being told a story that matches the photo. Still, I know it s best to just move on and focus on recovery.

  2. Keith July 28, 2018 at 1:44 pm - Reply

    Hello I found your site via tin eye a photo I loaded had lots of hits anyway I’ve been trying to locate her photo here but can’t find it I also thought of posting the scammers photos but again I haven’t as yet found out how.
    Also of interest to you I have a whole lots of scammers photos which im happy to give you and what back story I can remember.

Leave A Comment