Cognition and Trauma – The Impact Of Relationship Scams
Helping Scam Victims Understand How Traumatic Experiences Can Affect and Alter Cognition
Scam Victim Trauma – A SCARS Insight
Author:
• Tim McGuinness, Ph.D., DFin, MCPO, MAnth – Anthropologist, Scientist, Director of the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc.
Originally Published: 2020 – Article Updated: 2024
Article Abstract
Traumatic experiences, such as those resulting from scams, can significantly alter the cognition of victims. Trauma challenges core life assumptions, making individuals feel more vulnerable and altering their perception of safety and trust.
Scam victims may experience cognitive errors, such as misinterpreting benign situations as dangerous due to past trauma. They might also feel excessive guilt or survivor’s guilt, especially if they perceive themselves as less harmed than others. Idealization of the scammer and trauma-induced hallucinations or delusions can also occur. Victims often develop intrusive thoughts and memories, leading to strong emotional reactions.
The psychological impact includes confusion between past and present, obsessive behavior against scams, and a manic need to act against scammers. SCARS recommends local trauma counseling for all relationship scam victims to address these cognitive distortions and emotional challenges, emphasizing that ignoring the need for counseling can lead to long-term emotional health issues.
SCARS Recommended Books
Cognitions and Trauma – The Psychology of Scams
Traumatic Experiences can affect and alter the Cognition of Scam Victims
From the outset, trauma challenges the just-world or core life assumptions that help individuals navigate daily life. For example, it would be difficult to leave the house in the morning if you believed that the world was not safe, that all people are dangerous, or that life holds no promise. The belief that one’s efforts and intentions can protect oneself from bad things makes it less likely for an individual to perceive personal vulnerability. However, traumatic events—particularly if they are unexpected—can challenge such beliefs.
The following examples reflect some of the types of cognitive or thought-process changes that can occur in response to traumatic stress – such as from a romance scam.
Cognitive Errors:
Misinterpreting a current situation as dangerous because it resembles, even remotely, a previous trauma (e.g., overreacting to an overturned canoe in 8 inches of water, as if she and her paddle companion would drown, due to her previous experience of nearly drowning in a rip current 5 years earlier).
In the case of relationship scams, this can be overreacting to another’s concern because the scammer was also very attentive. Or jumping to a conclusion and calling other scammers because of an emotional reaction.
Excessive Or Inappropriate Guilt:
Attempting to make sense cognitively and gain control over a traumatic experience by assuming responsibility or possessing survivor’s guilt, because others who experienced the same trauma did not survive it.
Guilt can also come from not being as badly harmed in a lasting relationship scam – meaning not as financially damaged as others. Or the case where the victim feels that they have been much more traumatized than others.
Idealization:
Demonstrating inaccurate rationalizations, idealizations, or justifications of the perpetrator’s behavior, particularly if the perpetrator is or was a caregiver. Other similar reactions mirror idealization; traumatic bonding is an emotional attachment that develops (in part to secure survival) between perpetrators who engage in interpersonal trauma and their victims, and Stockholm syndrome involves compassion and loyalty toward hostage-takers.
This manifests in scam victims because they develop an emotional relationship with the scammer. Many victims express anger and hate towards the scammer in conversation with others but still have a lingering affection for the scammer long after the scam ends.
Trauma-Induced Hallucinations Or Delusions:
Experiencing hallucinations and delusions that, although they are biological in origin, contain cognitions that are congruent with trauma content (e.g., a woman believes that a person stepping onto her bus is her father, who had sexually abused her repeatedly as a child because he wore shoes similar to those her father once wore).
This actually happens to scam victims too, where they see a person that looks similar to the stolen face impersonated by the scammer. This can resolve in feelings of longing or the opposite of fear or terror. Some victims report “hearing” words said by the scammer after the scam ends.
It is very common for traumatized scam victims to feel a manic need to act against scams. It becomes a compulsion. They create amateur anti-scam groups and focus themselves and others on the hate for scammers. All the while increasing their own trauma without being aware.
Intrusive Thoughts And Memories:
Experiencing, without warning or desire, thoughts, and memories associated with the trauma.
These intrusive thoughts and memories can easily trigger strong emotional and behavioral reactions as if the trauma was recurring in the present. The intrusive thoughts and memories can come rapidly, referred to as flooding, and can be disruptive at the time of their occurrence. If an individual experiences a trigger, he or she may have an increase in intrusive thoughts and memories for a while.
For instance, individuals who inadvertently are retraumatized due to participation in anti-scam activities may have a surge of intrusive thoughts of the past trauma, thus making it difficult for them to discern what is happening now versus what happened then.
Whenever counseling or support focuses on trauma, it is likely that the client will experience some intrusive thoughts and memories too. It is important to develop coping strategies before, as much as possible, and during the delivery of trauma-informed support and trauma-specific treatment.
SCARS Recommends Local Trauma Counseling For All Relationship Scam Victims:
Regardless of your self-awareness, or perceived state, trauma is a ticking timebomb. A scam victim may think they are just fine, but months or years later it will have a significant impact on your emotional health and future relationship.
The failure of a scam victim to get counseling is not a sign of strength but of denial. Trauma counseling is not hard to find, though most counselors are not fully aware of this type of crime.
However, if they are a certified trauma counselor then they can focus on the impact and ignore the scam details – since those are not as important as the damage it caused. In fact, a victim who insists on talking about the details of a scam, such as a scammer’s dialog, promises, or negligence is exhibiting typical signs of trauma that should be addressed through counseling. Inappropriate focus is a clear sign of trauma and the need for real care.
Find trauma counseling or therapy here: counseling.AgainstScams.org
Psychology Disclaimer:
All articles about psychology and the human brain on this website are for information & education only
The information provided in this article is intended for educational and self-help purposes only and should not be construed as a substitute for professional therapy or counseling.
While any self-help techniques outlined herein may be beneficial for scam victims seeking to recover from their experience and move towards recovery, it is important to consult with a qualified mental health professional before initiating any course of action. Each individual’s experience and needs are unique, and what works for one person may not be suitable for another.
Additionally, any approach may not be appropriate for individuals with certain pre-existing mental health conditions or trauma histories. It is advisable to seek guidance from a licensed therapist or counselor who can provide personalized support, guidance, and treatment tailored to your specific needs.
If you are experiencing significant distress or emotional difficulties related to a scam or other traumatic event, please consult your doctor or mental health provider for appropriate care and support.
Also read our SCARS Institute Statement about Professional Care for Scam Victims – click here to go to our ScamsNOW.com website.
If you are in crisis, feeling desperate, or in despair please call 988 or your local crisis hotline.
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Important Information for New Scam Victims
- Please visit www.ScamVictimsSupport.org – a SCARS Website for New Scam Victims & Sextortion Victims
- Enroll in FREE SCARS Scam Survivor’s School now at www.SCARSeducation.org
- Please visit www.ScamPsychology.org – to more fully understand the psychological concepts involved in scams and scam victim recovery
If you are looking for local trauma counselors please visit counseling.AgainstScams.org or join SCARS for our counseling/therapy benefit: membership.AgainstScams.org
If you need to speak with someone now, you can dial 988 or find phone numbers for crisis hotlines all around the world here: www.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines
A Question of Trust
At the SCARS Institute, we invite you to do your own research on the topics we speak about and publish, Our team investigates the subject being discussed, especially when it comes to understanding the scam victims-survivors experience. You can do Google searches but in many cases, you will have to wade through scientific papers and studies. However, remember that biases and perspectives matter and influence the outcome. Regardless, we encourage you to explore these topics as thoroughly as you can for your own awareness.
Statement About Victim Blaming
Some of our articles discuss various aspects of victims. This is both about better understanding victims (the science of victimology) and their behaviors and psychology. This helps us to educate victims/survivors about why these crimes happened and to not blame themselves, better develop recovery programs, and to help victims avoid scams in the future. At times this may sound like blaming the victim, but it does not blame scam victims, we are simply explaining the hows and whys of the experience victims have.
These articles, about the Psychology of Scams or Victim Psychology – meaning that all humans have psychological or cognitive characteristics in common that can either be exploited or work against us – help us all to understand the unique challenges victims face before, during, and after scams, fraud, or cybercrimes. These sometimes talk about some of the vulnerabilities the scammers exploit. Victims rarely have control of them or are even aware of them, until something like a scam happens and then they can learn how their mind works and how to overcome these mechanisms.
Articles like these help victims and others understand these processes and how to help prevent them from being exploited again or to help them recover more easily by understanding their post-scam behaviors. Learn more about the Psychology of Scams at www.ScamPsychology.org
SCARS Resources:
- Getting Started Right: ScamVictimsSupport.org
- Sextortion Scam Victims: Sextortion Victims Support – The Essentials (scamvictimssupport.org)
- For New Victims of Relationship Scams newvictim.AgainstScams.org
- Subscribe to SCARS Newsletter newsletter.againstscams.org
- Sign up for SCARS professional support & recovery groups, visit support.AgainstScams.org
- Join our Scam Survivors United Chat & Discussion Group facebook.com/groups/scam.survivors.united
- Find competent trauma counselors or therapists, visit counseling.AgainstScams.org
- Become a SCARS Member and get free counseling benefits, visit membership.AgainstScams.org
- Report each and every crime, learn how to at reporting.AgainstScams.org
- Learn more about Scams & Scammers at RomanceScamsNOW.com and ScamsNOW.com
- Scammer photos ScammerPhotos.com
- SCARS Videos youtube.AgainstScams.org
- Self-Help Books for Scam Victims are at shop.AgainstScams.org
- Worldwide Crisis Hotlines: https://blog.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines/
Other Cyber Resources
- Block Scam Domains: Quad9.net
- Global Cyber Alliance ACT Cybersecurity Tool Website: Actionable Cybersecurity Tools (ACT) (globalcyberalliance.org) https://act.globalcyberalliance.org/index.php/Actionable_Cybersecurity_Tools_(ACT)_-_Simplified_Cybersecurity_Protection
- Wizer Cybersecurity Training – Free Security Awareness Training, Phishing Simulation and Gamification (wizer-training.com)
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To Learn More Also Look At Our Article Catalogs
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- ScamsNOW Magazine – ScamsNOW.com
- ContraEstafas.org
- ScammerPhotos.com
- AnyScam.com – reporting
- AgainstScams.org – SCARS Corporate Website
- SCARS YouTube Video Channel
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