Why Do Scam Victims Vilify Scammers?
Why Do Traumatized Scam Victims Prefer To Vilify Scammers And Believe That They Are Evil Demons Or Subhuman?
This is a complex question about good and evil in scammers.
The experience of being scammed can be incredibly traumatic for many people. Scammers use a variety of tactics to deceive and manipulate their victims, often leaving them feeling vulnerable, ashamed, and violated. As a result, it’s not uncommon for scam victims to develop negative perceptions of scammers, viewing them as evil, subhuman, or demonic.
In this essay, we’ll explore why this phenomenon occurs and what it can tell us about the psychology of traumaTrauma Emotional and psychological trauma is the result of extraordinarily stressful events that shatter your sense of security, making you feel helpless in a dangerous world. Psychological trauma can leave you struggling with upsetting emotions, memories, and anxiety that won’t go away. It can also leave you feeling numb, disconnected, and unable to trust other people. Traumatic experiences often involve a threat to life or safety or other emotional shocks, but any situation that leaves you feeling overwhelmed and isolated can result in trauma, even if it doesn’t involve physical harm. It’s not the objective circumstances that determine whether an event is traumatic, but your subjective emotional experience of the event. The more frightened and helpless you feel, the more likely you are to be traumatized. Trauma requires treatment, either through counseling or therapy or through trauma-oriented support programs, such as those offered by SCARS..
One reason why scam victims may vilify scammers is that it helps them to make sense of their experience.
ScamsScams A Scam is a confidence trick - a crime - is an attempt to defraud a person or group after first gaining their trust through deception. Scams or confidence tricks exploit victims using their credulity, naïveté, compassion, vanity, irresponsibility, or greed and exploiting that. Researchers have defined confidence tricks as "a distinctive species of fraudulent conduct ... intending to further voluntary exchanges that are not mutually beneficial", as they "benefit con operators ('con men' - criminals) at the expense of their victims (the 'marks')". A scam is a crime even if no money was lost. can be incredibly confusing and disorienting, leaving victims feeling like they’ve been taken advantage of or betrayed. By demonizing the scammerScammer A Scammer or Fraudster is someone that engages in deception to obtain money or achieve another objective. They are criminals that attempt to deceive a victim into sending more or performing some other activity that benefits the scammer., victims can create a narrative that makes sense of what happened to them. They can tell themselves that they were targeted by an evil or malicious person, rather than feeling like they were foolish or gullible.
Remember, scam victims ARE NOT foolish, gullible, or naive!
This type of thinking can be especially appealing to victims who feel like they’ve lost control of their lives. Scams often leave victims feeling powerless, as if they’ve been taken advantage of by someone who has more knowledge or resources than they do. Vilifying the scammer can help victims to regain some sense of power and control over the situation. By viewing the scammer as subhuman or demonic, victims can create a mental image of someone who is weaker or less powerful than they are. This can help to restore some of the victim’s sense of agency and control, which can be a crucial part of the healing process.
However, the irony is that this is the exact opposite of what they need to recover.
Consider the logic of believing that scammers are weaker, lazier, or inferior to the victim. This means they were scammed by someone dumber and weaker than they are. How does that make them feel? It creates shameShame Shame is an unpleasant self-conscious emotion typically associated with a negative evaluation of the self; withdrawal motivations; and feelings of distress, exposure, mistrust, powerlessness, and worthlessness. and guilt and self-blameSelf-Blame Victim blaming occurs when the victim of a crime or any wrongful act is held entirely or partially at fault for the harm that befell them. SCARS seeks to mitigate the prejudice against victims and the perception that victims are in any way responsible for the actions of offenders or scammers. There is historical and current prejudice against the victims of domestic violence and sex crimes, such as the greater tendency to blame victims of rape than victims of robbery. Scam victims are often blamed by family & friends for the crime. Scam victims also engage in self-blame even though they are not to blame. – how could someone like that have defeated them so easily?
Another reason why scam victims may vilify scammers is that it can be a way of protecting themselves emotionally.
Being scammed can be a deeply humiliating experience, especially if the victim feels like they should have known better. Vilifying the scammer can help victims to distance themselves from the experience, minimizing the emotional impact it has on them. If the victim can convince themselves that the scammer is evil or subhuman, they can avoid feeling like they were foolish or naive for falling for the scam.
This type of thinking can be particularly common in cases where the victim has lost a significant amount of money or other assets. Financial losses can be devastating, leaving victims feeling vulnerable and exposed. Vilifying the scammer can be a way of coping with the shame and embarrassment that often comes with losing money. By blamingBlaming Blame or Blaming is the act of censuring, holding responsible, making negative statements about an individual or group that their action or actions are socially or morally irresponsible, the opposite of praise. When someone is morally responsible for doing something wrong, their action is blameworthy. By contrast, when someone is morally responsible for doing something right, we may say that his or her action is praiseworthy. Blame imparts responsibility for an action or act, as in that they made a choice to perform that act or action. the scammer for their losses, victims can avoid feeling like they were responsible for what happened to them.
It’s worth noting that not all scam victims react in this way. Some may be more inclined to blameBlame Blame or Blaming is the act of censuring, holding responsible, making negative statements about an individual or group that their action or actions are socially or morally irresponsible, the opposite of praise. When someone is morally responsible for doing something wrong, their action is blameworthy. By contrast, when someone is morally responsible for doing something right, we may say that his or her action is praiseworthy. Blame imparts responsibility for an action or act, as in that they made a choice to perform that act or action. themselves or feel embarrassed, while others may seek to understand the motivations of the scammer and the broader societal factors that allow scams to occur. However, for those who do vilify scammers, it’s important to recognize that this type of thinking is not necessarily an accurate or fair portrayal of the scammer as an individual.
Scammers are human beings who have made a choice to engage in unethical or illegal behaviorBehavior Behavior / Behavioral Actions Otherwise known as habits, behavior or behavioral actions are strategies to help prevent online exploitation that target behavior, such as social engineering of victims. Changing your behavior is the ONLY effective means to reduce or prevent scams., but they are not inherently evil or subhuman. This type of thinking can be especially problematic if it leads to acts of violence or retribution against the scammer. While it’s natural to feel angry or resentful after being scammed, it’s important to channel those emotions in constructive ways that don’t harm others.
Furthermore, vilifying scammers can also lead to the dehumanization of other people who are perceived as “different” or “other.” When we start to view certain groups of people as less than human, it can create a dangerous precedent that justifies violence, discrimination, or oppression against those groups. This can apply to other victims too who were scammed by these lazy, stupid, evil scammers.
Therefore, it’s important to recognize that vilifying scammers is not a productive or constructive way of dealing with the trauma of being scammed.
It is important to recognize that scammers do evil but are not really evil themselves (at least the majority of them – exceptions do occur). It is important to remember that scammers are doing a job – a terrible job that hurts people – but for them, it is a job, a business, and they are disconnected from the pain they cause.
Understanding the true nature of scammers, and that they were better prepared – in fact experts in what they do will actually make it easier for victims to recover from the experience and in the process forgiveForgiveness What Is Forgiveness? Psychologists generally define forgiveness as a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed you, regardless of whether they actually deserve your forgiveness. themselves for having been scammed.
Believing That Scammers Are Evil Or Demons Can Easily Covert Into Hate In Scam Victims
Believing that scammers are evil or demons can be a common reaction among scam victims.
This belief can arise from the sense of violation and betrayal that victims often feel after being scammed. However, when this belief is taken to an extreme, it can lead to hate and prejudice against scammers.
One way that this can happen is through the process of dehumanization.
When people see others as subhuman or evil, they are more likely to treat them in ways that are cruel and degrading. This can lead to a cycle of hate and prejudice, where the victim becomes more and more entrenched in their belief that scammers are evil, and as a result, they become more and more willing to engage in hateful behavior towards scammers, hurting themselves and avoiding recovery in the process.
For example, a scam victim who believes that scammers are evil may be more likely to engage in vigilantism or harassment against suspected scammers – which serves no real purpose – it does not increase arrests, it just increases their own angerAnger Anger, also known as wrath or rage, is an intense emotional state involving a strong uncomfortable and non-cooperative response to a perceived provocation, trigger, hurt or threat. About one-third of scam victims become trapped in anger for extended periods of time following a scam. A person experiencing anger will often experience physical effects, such as increased heart rate, elevated blood pressure, and increased levels of adrenaline and noradrenaline. Some view anger as an emotion that triggers a part of the fight or flight response. Anger becomes the predominant feeling behaviorally, cognitively, and physiologically. Anger can have many physical and mental consequences. While most of those who experience anger explain its arousal as a result of "what has happened to them", psychologists point out that an angry person can very well be mistaken because anger causes a loss in self-monitoring capacity and objective observability., rageRage Anger, also known as wrath or rage, is an intense emotional state involving a strong uncomfortable and non-cooperative response to a perceived provocation, trigger, hurt or threat. About one-third of scam victims become trapped in anger for extended periods of time following a scam. A person experiencing anger will often experience physical effects, such as increased heart rate, elevated blood pressure, and increased levels of adrenaline and noradrenaline. Some view anger as an emotion that triggers a part of the fight or flight response. Anger becomes the predominant feeling behaviorally, cognitively, and physiologically. Anger can have many physical and mental consequences. While most of those who experience anger explain its arousal as a result of "what has happened to them", psychologists point out that an angry person can very well be mistaken because anger causes a loss in self-monitoring capacity and objective observability., and hate.
This belief can also lead to a lack of empathy for scammers, or in fact anyone that disagrees with their positions, which can further perpetuate the cycle of hate and prejudice. Scammers are often seen as deserving of punishment or retribution, rather than as individuals who may have their own vulnerabilities or difficult life circumstances. This can make it easier for scam victims to engage in hateful behavior, as they are less likely to see scammers as fellow human beings who are capable of experiencing pain and suffering and making their own mistakes.
It’s important to recognize that while scammers may engage in unethical or illegal behavior, they are still human beings who are capable of experiencing a range of emotions and experiences. Engaging in hate or prejudice towards scammers not only perpetuates harmful stereotypes and beliefs, but it can also prevent scam victims from fully processing and healing from their own trauma.
Instead of focusing on hate and prejudice, it’s important for scam victims to seek out support and healing. Therapy and support groups can be helpful in allowing victims to process their emotions and experiences in a safe and non-judgmental environment. Education and awareness-raising campaigns (like this article) can also help to dispel harmful stereotypes and beliefs about scammers while promoting empathy and understanding towards individuals who engage in scamming behavior.
Ultimately, it’s important for scam victims to recognize that while their feelings of anger and betrayal towards scammers are valid, engaging in hate or prejudice towards these individuals is not a helpful or productive way to cope with their trauma. Instead, it’s important to focus on healing and moving forward, while also advocating for measures that can prevent future scamming behavior and hold scammers accountable for their actions in a fair and just manner.
SCARS NOTE: please do not misunderstand. We believe that all scammers should face arrest and trial. They should be convicted of the crimes they commit and repay their victims in the process. However, looking at them as evil makes it impossible to fully recover from the crime the victims experienced. Eventually, victims must forgive themselves, and holding that hate inside makes that impossible.
Coping Mechanisms
Coping mechanisms are strategies that people use to manage the stress and emotional turmoil that they experience in response to difficult situations.
Coping mechanisms can be helpful in the short term, allowing people to feel more in control of their emotions and thoughts. However, when the mind creates coping mechanisms that are used in excess or become habitual, they can be harmful in the long run. This is especially true for scam victims who may have experienced significant trauma as a result of being scammed.
One reason why coping mechanisms can be harmful in the long run for scam victims is that they can prevent the person from fully processing and healing from the trauma. Coping mechanisms are often used as a way of avoiding difficult emotions or memories associated with the traumatic event (such as the scam and scammer.) While this can be helpful in the short term, it can also prevent the person from fully confronting and processing the trauma.
For example, if a scam victim copes by avoiding thinking about the scam altogether, they may miss out on the opportunity to learn from their experience and take steps to prevent future scams. Similarly, if a scam victim copes by engaging in self-destructiveSelf-sabotaging Behavior is said to be self-sabotaging when it creates problems in daily life and interferes with long-standing goals. The most common Self-Defeating behaviors include procrastination, self-medication with drugs or alcohol, comfort eating, and forms of self-injury such as cutting. behaviors such as substance abuse, or losing themselves to anger & hate, they may be compounding their problems rather than addressing the underlying trauma.
Another reason why coping mechanisms can be harmful in the long run for scam victims is that they can create a cycle of avoidance and self-blame. Coping mechanisms that involve blaming oneself or others for the trauma can perpetuate feelings of shame and guilt. For example, a scam victim who copes by blaming themselves for falling for the scam may feel like they are responsible for their own victimizationVictimization Victimization (or victimization) is the process of being victimized or becoming a victim. The field that studies the process, rates, incidence, effects, and prevalence of victimization is called victimology.. This can lead to a cycle of self-blame and avoidance, where the person avoids dealing with the trauma by engaging in unhealthy coping mechanisms.
Finally, coping mechanisms can be harmful because they can prevent the person from seeking help and support. Coping mechanisms that involve isolating oneself from others or denying the severity of the trauma can make it difficult for the person to reach out for help when they need it. For example, a scam victim who copes by avoiding social situations may miss out on the opportunity to connect with others who can offer support and understanding.
If you need support visit support.AgainstScams.org to sign up for a SCARS Support GroupSupport Group In a support group, members provide each other with various types of help, usually nonprofessional and nonmaterial, for a particular shared, usually burdensome, characteristic, such as romance scams. Members with the same issues can come together for sharing coping strategies, to feel more empowered and for a sense of community. The help may take the form of providing and evaluating relevant information, relating personal experiences, listening to and accepting others' experiences, providing sympathetic understanding and establishing social networks. A support group may also work to inform the public or engage in advocacy. They can be supervised or not. SCARS support groups are moderated by the SCARS Team and or volunteers. now!
In order to avoid the harmful effects of coping mechanisms, it’s important for scam victims to seek out professional help and support. Therapy can be a helpful way for scam victims to process their trauma and learn healthy coping strategies. Support groupsSupport Groups In a support group, members provide each other with various types of help, usually nonprofessional and nonmaterial, for a particular shared, usually burdensome, characteristic, such as romance scams. Members with the same issues can come together for sharing coping strategies, to feel more empowered and for a sense of community. The help may take the form of providing and evaluating relevant information, relating personal experiences, listening to and accepting others' experiences, providing sympathetic understanding and establishing social networks. A support group may also work to inform the public or engage in advocacy. They can be supervised or not. SCARS support groups are moderated by the SCARS Team and or volunteers. can also be a helpful way for scam victims to connect with others who have had similar experiences.
It’s also important for scam victims to be patient and kind to themselves as they navigate the healing process. Healing from trauma is a long and difficult journey, and it’s important for scam victims to take the time they need to fully confront and process their experiences. While coping mechanisms can be helpful in the short term, they are not a substitute for the healing and support that a person needs in order to fully recover from the trauma of being scammed.
For scam victim trauma counseling & therapy resources click here.
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SCARS provides the leading Support & Recovery program for relationship scamRelationship Scam A Relationship Scam is a one-to-one criminal act that involves a trust relationship and uses deception & manipulation to get a victim to give to the criminal something of value, such as money! Click here to learn more: What Is A Relationship Scam? victims – completely FREE!
Our managed peer supportPeer support Peer support occurs when people provide knowledge, experience, emotional, social or practical help to each other. It commonly refers to an initiative consisting of trained supporters and can take a number of forms such as peer mentoring, reflective listening (reflecting content and/or feelings), or in a support group. Peer support is also used to refer to initiatives where colleagues, members of self-help organizations and others meet, in person or online, to give each other connection and support on a reciprocal basis. Peer support is distinct from other forms of social support in that the source of support is a peer, a person who is similar in fundamental ways to the recipient of the support; their relationship is one of equality. A peer is in a position to offer support by virtue of relevant experience: he or she has "been there, done that" and can relate to others who are now in a similar situation. Trained peer support workers such as SCARS Volunteers receive special training and may be required to obtain Continuing Education Units, similar to clinical staff. Some other trained peer support workers may also be law-enforcement personnel and firefighters as well as emergency medical responders. groups allow victims to talk to other survivorsSurvivor A Scam Survivor is a victim who has been able to fully accept the reality of their situation. That they were the victim of a crime and are not to blame. They are working on their emotional recovery and reduction of any trauma either on their own, through a qualified support organization, or through counseling or therapy. And has done their duty and reported the crime to their local police, national police, and on Anyscam.com and recover in the most experienced environment possible, for as long as they need. Recovery takes as long as it takes – we put no limits on our support!
SCARS is the most trusted support & education provider in the world. Our team is certified in trauma-informedTrauma-Informed Trauma-informed care shifts the focus from “What’s wrong with you?” to “What happened to you?” A trauma-informed approach to care acknowledges that health care needs to have a complete picture of a patient’s life situation — past and present — in order to provide effective care services with a healing orientation. Adopting trauma-informed practices can potentially improve patient engagement, treatment adherence, and health outcomes. care, grief counselingCounseling Counseling is the professional guidance of the individual by utilizing psychological methods especially in collecting case history data, using various techniques of the personal interview, and testing interests and aptitudes. A mental health counselor (MHC), or counselor, is a person who works with individuals and groups to promote optimum mental and emotional health. Such persons may help individuals deal with issues associated with addiction and substance abuse; family, parenting, and marital problems; stress management; self-esteem; and aging. They may also work with "Social Workers", "Psychiatrists", and "Psychologists". SCARS does not provide mental health counseling., and so much more!
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SCARS GREEN BOOK
Self-Help Self-Paced Recovery Program Guide
LEARN HOW TO RECOVER ON YOUR OWN
This program is designed to help scam victims struggling to recover on their own and for those who want to understand the overall process. You can be using other resources, such as trauma counseling or therapy, qualified support groups, or completely independent – on your own!
The SCARS Steps program is a complete program and is provided for the purpose of helping scam victims to overcome this experience. Throughout this SCARS Steps Program, we speak about issues and challenges that a victim may have and help guide them through their recovery. But each person is different and it is important to understand your own reasons for being vulnerable to being scammed.
After the trauma of being scammed, you need to take steps to recover and move on. This may be an alternative to counseling in the short term, but we still encourage you to seek out professional help & support. Throughout this SCARS Steps Program, we speak about issues, challenges, defects, or problems that a victim may have in a generalized way.
The SCARS GREEN BOOK will help you recover from your scam offline and it will always be there when you need it!
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A Guide For Families & Friends Of Scam Victims
HOW TO HELP ROMANCE SCAM VICTIMS FOR FAMILIES & FRIENDS OF SCAM VICTIMS
This SCARS Publishing book represents a complete guide to help the families and friends understand how these scams work and how to help the victim.
The SCARS Slate Book should be purchased by family and friends to better understand what happened to the victim and the traumatic impact on them. But it can also be shared by the victim so that they do not have to explain to family and friends about the scam. This publication is to help others to help Scam Victims to make it through this traumatic experience and recover.
Each person is different and it is important to understand how relationship scamsRelationship Scam A Relationship Scam is a one-to-one criminal act that involves a trust relationship and uses deception & manipulation to get a victim to give to the criminal something of value, such as money! Click here to learn more: What Is A Relationship Scam? work and why people are vulnerable; to being scammed, how they were lured in, then groomed and manipulated. This understanding is essential in helping them through the process of ending the scam and then on to recovery. The SCARS Slate Book will provide the information necessary to help support a victim through this process.
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Helps you get and stay organized. This publication is to help Scam Victims organize their crime information. Complete this information before reporting to the police then bring this book with you
Before or after reporting to the police the RED BOOK gives you a dedicated tool to record all the essential facts of this crime. The Victim, the Scammers, the Money, and your Police interactions. Everything that really matters can be easily recorded for your immediate use and for the future!
As we have seen, money recovery/repayment programs can become available years after the scam ends and you need to keep all the details of this crime in case it is needed. We have also seen scammers being extradited to the U.S. and other countries, this will help in the event you testify or give statements, Additionally, this helps you have your information ready to qualify for victims’ benefits, compensation, or aid.
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