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Step 5

Did you do harm to others?

In most romance scams, you harmed someone. It may have been family or friends that you called liars? Or maybe you accepted stolen credit cards to make purchases for the scammer? Maybe you deposited bad checks? Maybe you involved others without a care?

Make a serious list of all the persons you might have harmed, and you will need to become willing to make amends to them all.

You need to think about the people you might have hurt. Write down and identify the wrongs you did so that you can repair the damage you’ve done. Then, you make a plan for restoring them. This also helps in creating healthy relationships moving forward.

What Do You Need To Do?

You will need rite down a list of all the people you have hurt. Often, this list includes people you hurt during the scam. However, it may go back further to include anyone you have hurt throughout your entire life.

Discover how many people you have hurt and how you’ve hurt them. You may not fully know; you may have to bring in the police and report everything to them too.

You have to make a list of everyone you’ve harmed along the way. Also, pay attention to what you discover about yourself and your problems also in each case. Don’t be defensive and blame people for how they’ve treated you. Forgive them, because without forgiving others, you cannot forgive yourself. This includes the scammer.

Don’t minimize your faults and failures by focusing on the faults of others, this is not about them, it is about you. Realize that you hurt others as well as yourself with your actions and behavior. Try hard to look beyond your obvious defects and do a thorough examination of your flaws in the process. Avoid judging others, accept them as they are. Be objective when evaluating your defects as well as those of others. Otherwise, how can other accept you?

People often think that if no one really knows about it, it doesn’t matter. Except you know about it. This dangerous purposeful forgetting will hold you back. You can’t get the most out of your recovery if you aren’t willing to be vulnerable and incredibly honest, even if what you discover about yourself and others is painful to accept.

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SCARS™ RomanceScamsNow.com™ is the official knowledge and victims' support publication of the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams™ Incorporated [SCARS]™ It is edited and published by the SCARS Team. Contact@AgainstScams.org SCARS is the world's leading anti-scam charitable nonprofit nongovernmental organization, based in Miami Florida U.S.A. Its founder has been involved in combating online fraud since 1991. SCARS™ - the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc. is a charitable nonprofit nongovernmental organization (NGO) dedicated to advocating victim's causes and changing government and law enforcement attitudes toward online fraud for good! Please join us in becoming a member of SCARS - it's free! Add your voice so that the world will listen at last - just go to www.AgainstScams.org. The SCARS|RSN website and all of our publications (including social media) are maintained by our own staff employees and volunteers to provide you the most up to date information about scams & scammers from around the world. We show you how to avoid them or recover from them. SCARS is the only registered online crime victims' assistance & support organization in the world. Be sure to report scammers here. Also, visit our main Facebook page for more information about romance scams.