While we don't include belief in higher powers or religion in our program, your faith can be the most powerful element in your recovery. We strongly suggest that you seek your priest, rabbi, or other spiritual leader to help you in regaining your equilibrium, as this will help you follow the RSN Steps and have a more successful recovery. We also recommend Yoga for those that can.
Make a real searching and penetrating moral inventory of yourself
During this step, you make a list of poor decisions or character flaws that brought you to this place.
This is where you begin to understand the causes of how you so easily became a victim of fraud. You will be examining your emotional problems in order to prepare yourself for a life without future scams. In the process, you may discover why you were alone to begin with, and maybe this understanding will allow you to find a life-partner after all.
You should also outline not just the hurt you caused yourself, but also hurt you caused to others. You probably alienated your family or friends when they tried to help you.
Also list your feelings, like fear and guilt, that motivated some of what led you here. Once you have acknowledged these items, they are less likely to serve as triggers to future online or scam abuse. You can use them to examine the future decisions that you make.
This is not easy, and is not done in a day. Keep your list handy so as insights emerge, you can write them down. Health professionals are trained to help you explore these, and you would be wise to seek one out.
What Do You Need To Do?
Be honest about your moral or personality defects. They can give you tremendous insight into why you fell for the scam in the first place.
You absolutely have to accept that the problem is within you, the scammer was just taking advantage of a problem that already existed inside you. They are a bug, but you let them in.
You were scammed, and certainly the scammer was a criminal, but you no longer get to blame anyone. You and you alone are responsible for your behavior. You really must accept this to move on.
So don't hold back. You don't have to share this with anyone else, but you must do it for yourself. You won't benefit if you don't own up to your shortcomings.
Trust yourself and remember: You are more than your mistakes. You are still a good person, and have people that care about you.
Be thorough and write down your inventory. This will be the first real proof of your process of recovery.
Remember, this is not meant to destroy your belief in yourself. It is meant to help you understand any false beliefs that you held, and so you can focus on your real strengths.
Take It ONE STEP At A Time!
You cannot be impatient. That is what got you scammed to begin with. There are no shortcuts!
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