Scam A Scam is a confidence trick - a crime - is an attempt to defraud a person or group after first gaining their trust through deception. Scams or confidence tricks exploit victims using their credulity, naïveté, compassion, vanity, irresponsibility, or greed and exploiting that. Researchers have defined confidence tricks as "a distinctive species of fraudulent conduct ... intending to further voluntary exchanges that are not mutually beneficial", as they "benefit con operators ('con men' - criminals) at the expense of their victims (the 'marks')". A scam is a crime even if no money was lost. Victims Often Sabotage Their Own Recovery After The Scam Ends – Victim Psychology
To Successfully Recover It Is Important To Understand How This Happens
When you feel the tension like this building within you, take a long, deep breath. Consider the potential consequences or implications of overreacting to it. It’s also important to understand what’s causing that stress and unrest to feed negative emotions. You can see emotional ticking time bombs in action in your daily life, too.
For example: You can see it in a hospital with two nurses, one cheerful and compassionate, the other rushed and unfriendly. You can see it in your own office, with two people in the same position coping differently with their tasks.
Our beliefs, filters, biases, upbringing, life experience, values, and health all contribute to how we process situations. These differences are why we all have different emotional responses to an identical situation.
This is especially true for scam victims. Overreactions and outbursts happen regularly, and it is the number one reason why victims do not stay in recovery of any type.
To manage these emotions, you must identify them and ask yourself why you feel this way. Acknowledge it but put space/time between the trigger A trigger is a stimulus that sets off a memory of a trauma or a specific portion of a traumatic experience. and response, and actively choose how you respond.
The greatest challenge in managing your emotions is putting space between the trigger and your initial response. You can do this with a few deep breaths or by walking away from the situation where possible. You can do it by putting yourself or the other person in time-out.
This technique will allow you the time to choose your response actively. For some, it only takes a few minutes, but for those deeply traumatized it may take several days to reset their emotions.
You can’t control your immediate emotional response to an event or situation. However, you can manage your response, which is the key to diffusing an emotional ticking time bomb.
- Frustration – there’s an obstacle in your path. People are not helping or saving you as you believe they should.
- Fear – your brain is trying to protect you. Victims often carry fear for many months after the scam ends.
- Disappointment – an expectation hasn’t been met. Expectations are a real enemy immediately after the scam ends and for months, sometimes years afterward.
- Self-Doubt – you’re underestimating your worth. This takes many forms, but constantly asking “what if” questions is one of them.
- Anger Anger, also known as wrath or rage, is an intense emotional state involving a strong uncomfortable and non-cooperative response to a perceived provocation, trigger, hurt or threat. About one-third of scam victims become trapped in anger for extended periods of time following a scam.
A person experiencing anger will often experience physical effects, such as increased heart rate, elevated blood pressure, and increased levels of adrenaline and noradrenaline. Some view anger as an emotion that triggers a part of the fight or flight response. Anger becomes the predominant feeling behaviorally, cognitively, and physiologically.
Anger can have many physical and mental consequences. While most of those who experience anger explain its arousal as a result of "what has happened to them", psychologists point out that an angry person can very well be mistaken because anger causes a loss in self-monitoring capacity and objective observability. – your values are being challenged. People tell you what you should do, but you just know better and anger is your default response.
This is something that happens to most victims that are not in counseling Counseling is the professional guidance of the individual by utilizing psychological methods especially in collecting case history data, using various techniques of the personal interview, and testing interests and aptitudes.
A mental health counselor (MHC), or counselor, is a person who works with individuals and groups to promote optimum mental and emotional health. Such persons may help individuals deal with issues associated with addiction and substance abuse; family, parenting, and marital problems; stress management; self-esteem; and aging. They may also work with "Social Workers", "Psychiatrists", and "Psychologists".
SCARS does not provide mental health counseling. or professional support groups In a support group, members provide each other with various types of help, usually nonprofessional and nonmaterial, for a particular shared, usually burdensome, characteristic, such as romance scams. Members with the same issues can come together for sharing coping strategies, to feel more empowered and for a sense of community. The help may take the form of providing and evaluating relevant information, relating personal experiences, listening to and accepting others' experiences, providing sympathetic understanding and establishing social networks. A support group may also work to inform the public or engage in advocacy. They can be supervised or not. SCARS support groups are moderated by the SCARS Team and or volunteers. and we want to place special focus on helping you avoid these situations. The obsessive viewing and exposing of scammers is a manifestation of these.
This is from our Grief Counseling Training Guide Book that will be available in the next few months.