Updated on by

SCARS™ Opinion: Frustration

So Many Of You Express Frustration With The Way Things Are

Don’t Take This As An Attack On You But Consider …

Is it frustrating that you can buy alcohol that causes deaths every day? Or cigarettes?

We all know the cigarettes kill right? Want to know a secret? There are more smokers today than ever – worldwide that is. Why? Because cigarettes are a drug. People want that drug. But at least there is no more growth – numbers of smokers are trending down.

What About Scammers?

Scammers are just like cigarettes – they are a drug delivery mechanism. The drug being that fantasy relationship.

Think about that for a minute. Think about how you felt during the relationship?

Were you high from the attention? From the affection?

You were on drugs.

Those were real drugs flowing through your body. Those were hormones that your body makes when “excited” to release them.

In short, every scam victim that went into it fully was a drug user – even though it was being produced by your own body.

Scammers are simply a mechanism of delivery – the marketing channel for fantasies that consumers want to buy – even if they do not know it.

Then when discovered (just like lung cancer) you wonder why you did it.

You see the scammers are not the problem. At least not the main problem. They are just opportunists, just like cancer.

We will only be able to control the drug producers so far as long as there is demand.

Same is true for scammers. While we are making huge progress, we have seen that in the case of the war on drugs that it is still bad.

  • Education is critical, but as we have seen with drugs, it is not enough.
  • Enforcement is critical, but as we have seen with drugs, it is not enough.
  • Politics is critical, but as we have seen with drugs, it is not enough.
  • Recovery is critical, but as we have seen with drugs, it is not enough.

What Is The Answer?

How did we as a society reduce drunk driving be over 75%?

How did we as a society reduce rapes by over 50%?

Consider – According to the NSVRC (nsvrc.org):

  • The lifetime cost of rape per victim is $122,461
  • Annually, rape costs the U.S. more than any other crime ($127 billion), followed by assault ($93 billion), murder ($71 billion), and drunk driving, including fatalities ($61 billion)

Except now we know that cybercrime is the top crime worldwide costing the U.S. nearly a TRILLION dollars a year alone.

What we know in all of these cases is that we cannot just enforce our way out of this – we must change who WE are!

Scamming Stops With Each And Every One Of Us

Scamming stops when we stop giving in to it. It stops when we share what we know without fear.

It stops when everyone is on the same page.

How Do We Do That?

We follow the MADD Model (Mothers Against Drunk Driving). Standardize the message, combine the lobbying and political will, and educate consistently and factually. Otherwise it is all just noise.

SCARS is working for clarity and to eliminate the noise but most scam victims are drawn to the noise and much less is happening that could be done. Worse still, is that the victims who are drawn to the noise do not get the help they need.

Each and every one of us is both the cause and the cure.

When we sing with a single voice we have clarify. When we do not it is just noise.

You can help others understand this. You can help other groups come and join with us. There are nearly 100 anti-scam groups that are members of SCARS right now. But there are thousands that are not.

Or we could all just quit and go sit on a beach. But eventually, the war comes back to you no matter where you hide.

Eventually, We All Learn That Truth.

What Will You Do?

Cynthia Reyes
Compliance Officer
Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc.



SCARS the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Incorporated


A SCARS Division
Miami Florida U.S.A.




– – – – – – – – – – – – – – END – – – – – – – – – – – – &n