SCARS Institute’s Encyclopedia of Scams™ Published Continuously for 25 Years
ABOUT ANTI-SCAMMERS ONLINE AND IN SOCIAL MEDIA
For 26 years we have been attempting to help others be aware of and overcome scams.
We were founded by the cofounder of several major online businesses, such as TigerDirect, and through those lenses he saw the initiation and evolution of online scams.
Over the years, we became increasingly aware of how similar, and actually identical, being a scam victim was to being a drug addict. The scam (that is the romance part of it) fuels many basic needs and in fact floods the brain with a real drugs, endorphins, dopamine, seratonin, and more (research is readily available so I will not cover it here).
So as the scam progresses the victim becomes increasingly dependent on it.
Then comes the break. The moment when the scam is seen for what it is.
Except, that all loss (including this one) follows the stages of grief that other forms of loss follow (see the graphic below).
The victim was in fact in love with the scammer, and the realization is worse than a loved one dying, it is a total betrayal and it is the disappearance of the face the person grew to know.
Nothing can make up for it, it is just what it is. They were violated and used in the worst way. The brain uses anger as a way to recover from that trauma. This is just how we humans are wired.
For most, the anger can lead to a next stage in the recovery – sometimes depression, sometimes an attempt to find another solution, and for the healthy ones to eventual acceptance. Unfortunately, many become trapped in their anger, in their rage. Any attempt to help them move beyond that stage is met with hostility. We call these “Ragers”.
“Ragers” (or “Haters”) are, at their core, trapped in their anger, and use this as justification for their view about everyone and everything related to scamming.
These “Ragers” have lost the ability to both trust and recognize truth. They see red and apply the simple rule that they are right and if anyone disagrees with them they are fake or scammers or liars. This is what being trapped in the grief cycle does to you. If you see that in yourself, there is help, but only if you allow it.
Sadly, so many in the anti-scam groups on the web and on Facebook are lead by people trapped in these cycles, or they are disruptive to other victims attempting to recover from the scam. The number of examples is too numerous to even list. We estimate that about 10% of victims fall into this trap, and stay there for many years – some never leave it.
Regardless of who you follow or listen to, be watchful for the signs of “Ragers” in these groups and organizations. As a recoverer from a scam, “Ragers” are as toxic to you as another addict is to a recovering substance abuser.
Playing with the hearts and minds of victims is the most disastrous thing these amateur anti-scammers can do, People reach points of such despair that they take their own lives (Boyati Miskun for example – learn more here on the SCARS website or on Facebook)
For most of these Ragers, it is not intentionally about egos or vengeance or rage, it is about a sincere desire to help victims move beyond the scam and recover their lives. Nothing more. Ragers are so locked in their anger, all they can see is their own need for revenge, and anyone that won’t go with them is an enemy.
We hope that you all read this and will help others in need find support and avoid these groups dominated by Ragers and self-aggrandizers.
As an organization, we believe in openness and transparency, and even if you don’t like us for whatever reason, we hope you will use our knowledge and research to help others. As the Scam Avoidance Education and Victims Support Unit of the Society of Citizens Against Romance Scams we follow a strict Code of Conduct and other ethical and legal standards. For the first time in the last few years, there are lights at the end of the tunnel.
For now, if you need help and honestly want it, let us know, we offer real support groups filled with honest caring people who have been victims, but are now recovering together. If on the other hand you are looking for confirmation of your own rage, we can’t help you, because you are just not ready for it.
RSN Team
A Unit of SCARS
SCARS and Society of Citizens Against Romance Scams are trademarks of the Society of Citizens Against Romance Scams
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Important Information for New Scam Victims
- Please visit www.ScamVictimsSupport.org – a SCARS Website for New Scam Victims & Sextortion Victims
- Enroll in FREE SCARS Scam Survivor’s School now at www.SCARSeducation.org
- Please visit www.ScamPsychology.org – to more fully understand the psychological concepts involved in scams and scam victim recovery
If you are looking for local trauma counselors please visit counseling.AgainstScams.org or join SCARS for our counseling/therapy benefit: membership.AgainstScams.org
If you need to speak with someone now, you can dial 988 or find phone numbers for crisis hotlines all around the world here: www.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines
A Note About Labeling!
We often use the term ‘scam victim’ in our articles, but this is a convenience to help those searching for information in search engines like Google. It is just a convenience and has no deeper meaning. If you have come through such an experience, YOU are a Survivor! It was not your fault. You are not alone! Axios!
A Question of Trust
At the SCARS Institute, we invite you to do your own research on the topics we speak about and publish, Our team investigates the subject being discussed, especially when it comes to understanding the scam victims-survivors experience. You can do Google searches but in many cases, you will have to wade through scientific papers and studies. However, remember that biases and perspectives matter and influence the outcome. Regardless, we encourage you to explore these topics as thoroughly as you can for your own awareness.
Statement About Victim Blaming
Some of our articles discuss various aspects of victims. This is both about better understanding victims (the science of victimology) and their behaviors and psychology. This helps us to educate victims/survivors about why these crimes happened and to not blame themselves, better develop recovery programs, and to help victims avoid scams in the future. At times this may sound like blaming the victim, but it does not blame scam victims, we are simply explaining the hows and whys of the experience victims have.
These articles, about the Psychology of Scams or Victim Psychology – meaning that all humans have psychological or cognitive characteristics in common that can either be exploited or work against us – help us all to understand the unique challenges victims face before, during, and after scams, fraud, or cybercrimes. These sometimes talk about some of the vulnerabilities the scammers exploit. Victims rarely have control of them or are even aware of them, until something like a scam happens and then they can learn how their mind works and how to overcome these mechanisms.
Articles like these help victims and others understand these processes and how to help prevent them from being exploited again or to help them recover more easily by understanding their post-scam behaviors. Learn more about the Psychology of Scams at www.ScamPsychology.org
Psychology Disclaimer:
All articles about psychology and the human brain on this website are for information & education only
The information provided in this article is intended for educational and self-help purposes only and should not be construed as a substitute for professional therapy or counseling.
While any self-help techniques outlined herein may be beneficial for scam victims seeking to recover from their experience and move towards recovery, it is important to consult with a qualified mental health professional before initiating any course of action. Each individual’s experience and needs are unique, and what works for one person may not be suitable for another.
Additionally, any approach may not be appropriate for individuals with certain pre-existing mental health conditions or trauma histories. It is advisable to seek guidance from a licensed therapist or counselor who can provide personalized support, guidance, and treatment tailored to your specific needs.
If you are experiencing significant distress or emotional difficulties related to a scam or other traumatic event, please consult your doctor or mental health provider for appropriate care and support.
Also read our SCARS Institute Statement about Professional Care for Scam Victims – click here to go to our ScamsNOW.com website.
Wow! very well written, deepest understanding for the victim. It’s not easy to heal a would, which will leave a deep scar. Easily said but the true fact is, it’s a long painful journey. Need neves as hard as steel to survive.
THANK YOU!
Would love to join your group and help in any way I can.
OUR VOLUNTEERS HELP ON FACEBOOK. IF YOU ARE INTERESTED SEND US AN EMAIL: INFO@ROMANCESCAMSNOW.COM