Scam Victim’s Responsibilities

What Are The Responsibilities Of A Scam Victim?

The Needs Of A Victim After The Scam

Scam Victim Recovery – A SCARS Insight

What Responsibilities Does A Scam Victim Have After They Become A Victim Of A Scam?

Scam Victims Have A Duty To Their Fellow Citizens But Also To Themselves!

Every member of a culture has a duty to help make life better for themselves and for others, especially a scam victim. When we turn away from this duty we contribute to its decline. But also, far too many people only help to satisfy their own needs and desires. They help because it fulfills their needs, not those of others or their society.

Each member of society, including scam victims, has an obligation to recover and do what they can to improve the world. The management of SCARS all volunteer their time to help others. You can too!

Scam Victim: From The Beginning

From the very beginning, scam victims have certain things that they should and must do, both for themselves and for those around them. This is complicated by the emotional state of the victim and their trauma. Some victims automatically justify their aggression and the desire for revenge, others believe that nothing really happened to them but that they are the “one” that will save everyone else. Neither of these is valid or healthy.

The problem is that all victims of serious crimes experience some trauma, and relationship scam victims can be profoundly traumatized. So much so that they may believe they are not, that the scam did not really affect them, and as a result feed the negative aspects of anger or denial or freeze increasing their trauma in the process over time. As we have said before, trauma doesn’t just go away!

The purpose of this short article is to help a scam victim keep everything in perspective. This is a kind of “to-do list” of the duty and responsibility that every scam victim has, even if they choose to ignore it!

A Scam Victim’s Responsibilities

An important point. Recovery is not just something to want, it is a moral imperative! If you do not recover from this experience or if you chose to ignore your responsibilities, then the criminals win. This really is a question of right versus wrong, good versus evil.

The choices and mistakes you make no longer matter. What matters are the decisions you make after the scam ends.

These are what we view as the basic responsibilities of every scam victim:

  1. Acknowledge and accept that you are the victim of a crime. That it happened. That you were the victim of a criminal act.
  2. Begin to change your vocabulary and terminology about what happened. Using the right terms will make it easier for you to accept the situation and help begin the mental adjustments that will come. This was a crime, and the scammer was a criminal. Use these terms as much as possible, instead of scam and scammer.
  3. You must properly report the crime to law enforcement. This is the first step in your re-taking control of your life following the scam. You are breaking free and are acting outside of the manipulation and the wishes of the criminal (the scammer).
  4. Focus on yourself first – at least initially until you are far more recovered. No victim can help others if they are not yet able to moderate and control themself. Saving others or getting revenge is just another fantasy, at least until you are fully recovered.
  5. Recognize, whether you feel it or not, you are traumatized. How much or how deeply depends on many factors such as resiliency, but it is still there. Denying this is simply greater proof of that trauma.
  6. Try hard to moderate your emotions so that you can be helped. You may be angry or not want to talk, but if you turn your aggression or denial on the people trying to help you then you will cut off the help you need.
  7. You have a duty to share your story. It is only embarrassing because you are allowing it to be. Once you start talking to other victims about the crime it will become easier. It is also beneficial in helping to moderate and manage your trauma. But it also serves to help others understand that they are not alone – others have or will do that so you can feel that, and in turn, owe it to other victims to do the same.
  8. Find professional help both with your recovery from your experience but also for the deeper traumatic effects. You may not fully understand how much you have been affected, but it is there nonetheless. We recommend that all scam victims get local help from a trauma counselor or therapist. And that when they are ready, they join a qualified, professionally managed support group. But also understand that you may not be ready for a support group, in these cases start with counseling to prepare you to be more stable and ready for a group.
  9. You must actively participate in your own recovery. No one can save you – this is not a fairy tale. This dragon can only be vanquished by your own actions.
  10. You must learn the truth about how these crimes function, both to aid in your own understanding and what that will allow you to do during your recovery, but also to help stamp out urban legends and misinformation spread by so many others. Scam victims look for easy answers that satisfy their fight or flight responses (anger or denial), but ironically the real answers are far more satisfying because they make it clear that you were not to blame.
  11. Recognize that shame, guilt, and blame are just your own beliefs, they are not objective truths. You are not to blame. There is no reason for shame. You are the victim of a crime!
  12. Remember that you are worthy and a valuable person in your own right. This crime is something that happened, it is not who you are.
  13. Learn to recognize your trauma (emotional) triggers so that you can control yourself around others. This will allow you to re-establish relationships with family and friends who may have suffered or been harmed during the crime.
  14. Don’t let yourself judge other victims or compare their situation to your own. Each person has their own hell to escape from.
  15. Prioritize your recovery, at least half as much as you prioritized your fake relationship.
  16. Accept that you harmed others during your scam. It may have just been that you pushed them away, or it may have been more serious, but either way, you must admit this and begin to make up for it.
  17. Once you are well on your way to recovery, make a real effort to help the next victims. You were helped by strangers who did not know you, and now you have a duty to help those who came after you. You can do this in many ways:
    1. Provide support and compassion to other victims that you encounter – they need it just as you did. Clicking LIKE is NOT providing support, use real words – they matter.
    2. Help them learn the lessons of the criminal experience, and point them in the direction of authentic information about how and why this happened. They will also be confused and may have listened to the wrong people.
    3. Steer them toward the right professional help. Trauma counselors, therapists, attorneys, financial professionals, law enforcement, and crime victims’ assistance providers such as SCARS.
  18. However, do not try to help others more than you are able to. If you start to get frustrated it means you are not yet ready or it means you are taking on someone else’s trauma. Remember that trauma is contagious  Remember that you are struggling too!
  19. Tell your family and friends about what happened (look at our guide to help you with this). You do not need to tell them very much, but you become someone who can help spread the word! If you don’t do it, you may be dooming someone else to follow the same path when you might have changed their future. You can do this!
  20. When you feel ready, volunteer to more actively help victims – either by working with an organization such as SCARS, or contacting your local police and making yourself available as a Victim’s Advocate to help them through the process that you had to do alone.
  21. Remember that elections have consequences. Certain political points of view tolerate criminals, others do not. Learn the difference and why this is so. Become an advocate! You can work with SCARS and independently. Every voice matters!

Of course, there may be more, but you should be aware that recovery begins selfishly by necessity, but as time progresses there is an obligation to contribute back what you received from others. Each person “pays it forward” as the saying goes. And every one that breaks the chain endangers others who will not be able to hear the words that could have prevented it or the words that might help them see their path forward.

Remember This Was Done For You

When you are ready, do it for the next, and the next, and the next!

We know that you can! And just imagine how proud of yourself you will be when you help the next person find their way! You will be a hero! You will be a survivor and no longer a victim!

SCARS Resources:

Other Cyber Resources

-/ 30 /-

What do you think about this?
Please share your thoughts in a comment below!

SCARS FREE Support & Recovery Program - 4 EVER FREE

Do You Need Support?
Get It Now!

SCARS provides the leading Support & Recovery program for relationship scam victims – completely FREE!

Our managed peer support groups allow victims to talk to other survivors and recover in the most experienced environment possible, for as long as they need. Recovery takes as long as it takes – we put no limits on our support!

SCARS is the most trusted support & education provider in the world. Our team is certified in trauma-informed care, grief counseling, and so much more!

To apply to join our groups visit

We also offer separate support groups for family & friends too.

SCARS STAR Membership

Become a

SCARS offers memberships in our STAR program, which includes many benefits for a very low annual membership fee!

SCARS STAR Membership benefits include:

  • FREE Counseling or Therapy Benefit from our partner
  • Exclusive members-only content & publications
  • Discounts on SCARS Self-Help Books Save
  • And more!

To learn more about the SCARS STAR Membership visit

To become a SCARS STAR Member right now visit

SCARS Publishing Self-Help Recovery Books Available At

Scam Victim Self-Help Do-It-Yourself Recovery Books

SCARS Printed Books For Every Scam Survivor From SCARS Publishing


Each is based on our SCARS Team’s 32-plus years of experience.

SCARS Website Visitors receive an Extra 10% Discount
Use Discount Code “romanacescamsnow” at Checkout



Legal Disclaimer:

The content provided on this platform regarding psychological topics is intended solely for educational and entertainment purposes. The publisher makes no representations or warranties regarding the accuracy or completeness of the information presented. The content is designed to raise awareness about various psychological subjects, and readers are strongly encouraged to conduct their own research and verify information independently.

The information presented does not constitute professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment of any psychological disorder or disease. It is not a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Readers are advised to seek the guidance of a licensed medical professional for any questions or concerns related to their mental health.

The publisher disclaims any responsibility for actions taken or not taken based on the content provided. The treatment of psychological issues is a serious matter, and readers should consult with qualified professionals to address their specific circumstances. The content on this platform is not intended to create, and receipt of it does not constitute, a therapist-client relationship.

Interpretation and Definitions


For the purposes of this Disclaimer:

  • Company (referred to as either “the Company”, “We”, “Us” or “Our” in this Disclaimer) refers to Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc. (registered d.b.a. “SCARS”,) 9561 Fountainbleau Blvd., Suit 602, Miami FL 33172.
  • Service refers to the Website.
  • You means the individual accessing this website, or the company, or other legal entity on behalf of which such individual is accessing or using the Service, as applicable.
  • Website refers to, accessible from

Website Disclaimer

The information contained on this website is for general information purposes only.

The Company assumes no responsibility for errors or omissions in the contents of the Service.

In no event shall the Company be liable for any special, direct, indirect, consequential, or incidental damages or any damages whatsoever, whether in an action of contract, negligence or other tort, arising out of or in connection with the use of the Service or the contents of the Service. The Company reserves the right to make additions, deletions, or modifications to the contents on the Service at any time without prior notice.

The Company does not warrant this website in any way.

External Links Disclaimer

This website may contain links to external websites that are not provided or maintained by or in any way affiliated with the Company.

Please note that the Company does not guarantee the accuracy, relevance, timeliness, or completeness of any information on these external websites.

Errors and Omissions Disclaimer

The information given by SCARS is for general guidance on matters of interest only. Even if the Company takes every precaution to ensure that the content of this website is both current and accurate, errors can occur. Plus, given the changing nature of laws, rules, and regulations, there may be delays, omissions, or inaccuracies in the information contained on this website.

SCARS is not responsible for any errors or omissions, or for the results obtained from the use of this information.

Fair Use Disclaimer

SCARS may use copyrighted material that has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. The Company is making such material available for criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research.

The Company believes this constitutes a “fair use” of any such copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the United States Copyright law.

If You wish to use copyrighted material from this website for your own purposes that go beyond fair use, You must obtain permission from the copyright owner.

Views Expressed Disclaimer

The Service may contain views and opinions which are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of any other author, agency, organization, employer, or company, including SCARS.

Comments published by users are their sole responsibility and the users will take full responsibility, liability, and blame for any libel or litigation that results from something written in or as a direct result of something written in a comment. The Company is not liable for any comment published by users and reserves the right to delete any comment for any reason whatsoever.

No Responsibility Disclaimer

The information on the Service is provided with the understanding that the Company is not herein engaged in rendering legal, accounting, tax, medical or mental health, or other professional advice and services. As such, it should not be used as a substitute for consultation with professional accounting, tax, legal, medical or mental health, or other competent advisers.

In no event shall the Company, its team, board of directors, volunteers, or its suppliers be liable for any special, incidental, indirect, or consequential damages whatsoever arising out of or in connection with your access or use or inability to access or use the Service.

“Use at Your Own Risk” Disclaimer

All information on this website is provided “as is”, with no guarantee of completeness, accuracy, timeliness or of the results obtained from the use of this information, and without warranty of any kind, express or implied, including, but not limited to warranties of performance, merchantability, and fitness for a particular purpose.

SCARS will not be liable to You or anyone else for any decision made or action taken in reliance on the information given by the Service or for any consequential, special, or similar damages, even if advised of the possibility of such damages.

Contact Us

If you have any questions about this Disclaimer, You can contact Us:

  • By email:

PLEASE NOTE: Psychology Clarification

The following specific modalities within the practice of psychology are restricted to psychologists appropriately trained in the use of such modalities:

  • Diagnosis: The diagnosis of mental, emotional, or brain disorders and related behaviors.
  • Psychoanalysis: Psychoanalysis is a type of therapy that focuses on helping individuals to understand and resolve unconscious conflicts.
  • Hypnosis: Hypnosis is a state of trance in which individuals are more susceptible to suggestion. It can be used to treat a variety of conditions, including anxiety, depression, and pain.
  • Biofeedback: Biofeedback is a type of therapy that teaches individuals to control their bodily functions, such as heart rate and blood pressure. It can be used to treat a variety of conditions, including stress, anxiety, and pain.
  • Behavioral analysis: Behavioral analysis is a type of therapy that focuses on changing individuals’ behaviors. It is often used to treat conditions such as autism and ADHD.
    Neuropsychology: Neuropsychology is a type of psychology that focuses on the relationship between the brain and behavior. It is often used to assess and treat cognitive impairments caused by brain injuries or diseases.

SCARS and the members of the SCARS Team do not engage in any of the above modalities in relationship to scam victims. SCARS is not a mental healthcare provider and recognizes the importance of professionalism and separation between its work and that of the licensed practice of psychology.

SCARS is an educational provider of generalized self-help information that individuals can use for their own benefit to achieve their own goals related to emotional trauma. SCARS recommends that all scam victims see professional counselors or therapists to help them determine the suitability of any specific information or practices that may help them.

SCARS cannot diagnose or treat any individuals, nor can it state the effectiveness of any educational information that it may provide, regardless of its experience in interacting with traumatized scam victims over time. All information that SCARS provides is purely for general educational purposes to help scam victims become aware of and better understand the topics and to be able to dialog with their counselors or therapists.

It is important that all readers understand these distinctions and that they apply the information that SCARS may publish at their own risk, and should do so only after consulting a licensed psychologist or mental healthcare provider.






This content and other material contained on the website, apps, newsletter, and products (“Content”), is general in nature and for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical, legal, or financial advice; the Content is not intended to be a substitute for licensed or regulated professional advice. Always consult your doctor or other qualified healthcare provider, lawyer, financial, or tax professional with any questions you may have regarding the educational information contained herein. SCARS makes no guarantees about the efficacy of information described on or in SCARS’ Content. The information contained is subject to change and is not intended to cover all possible situations or effects. SCARS does not recommend or endorse any specific professional or care provider, product, service, or other information that may be mentioned in SCARS’ websites, apps, and Content unless explicitly identified as such.

The disclaimers herein are provided on this page for ease of reference. These disclaimers supplement and are a part of SCARS’ website’s Terms of Use. 

All original content is Copyright © 1991 – 2023 Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc. (Registered D.B.A SCARS) All Rights Reserved Worldwide & Webwide. Third-party copyrights acknowledge.

U.S. State of Florida Registration Nonprofit (Not for Profit) #N20000011978 [SCARS DBA Registered #G20000137918] – Learn more at

View the claimed and or registered indicia, service marks, and trademarks of Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc., All Rights Reserved Worldwide

Contact the law firm for the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Incorporated by email at

Share This Information - Choose Your Social Media!

Leave A Comment