SCARS Institute’s Encyclopedia of Scams™ Published Continuously for 25 Years
Scam Victims Often Sabotage Their Own Recovery After The Scam Ends – Victim Psychology
To Successfully Recover It Is Important To Understand How This Happens
When you feel the tension like this building within you, take a long, deep breath. Consider the potential consequences or implications of overreacting to it. It’s also important to understand what’s causing that stress and unrest to feed negative emotions. You can see emotional ticking time bombs in action in your daily life, too.
For example: You can see it in a hospital with two nurses, one cheerful and compassionate, the other rushed and unfriendly. You can see it in your own office, with two people in the same position coping differently with their tasks.
Our beliefs, filters, biases, upbringing, life experience, values, and health all contribute to how we process situations. These differences are why we all have different emotional responses to an identical situation.
This is especially true for scam victims. Overreactions and outbursts happen regularly, and it is the number one reason why victims do not stay in recovery of any type.
To manage these emotions, you must identify them and ask yourself why you feel this way. Acknowledge it but put space/time between the trigger and response, and actively choose how you respond.
The greatest challenge in managing your emotions is putting space between the trigger and your initial response. You can do this with a few deep breaths or by walking away from the situation where possible. You can do it by putting yourself or the other person in time-out.
This technique will allow you the time to choose your response actively. For some, it only takes a few minutes, but for those deeply traumatized it may take several days to reset their emotions.
You can’t control your immediate emotional response to an event or situation. However, you can manage your response, which is the key to diffusing an emotional ticking time bomb.
FIVE SABOTEURS
- Frustration – there’s an obstacle in your path. People are not helping or saving you as you believe they should.
- Fear – your brain is trying to protect you. Victims often carry fear for many months after the scam ends.
- Disappointment – an expectation hasn’t been met. Expectations are a real enemy immediately after the scam ends and for months, sometimes years afterward.
- Self-Doubt – you’re underestimating your worth. This takes many forms, but constantly asking “what if” questions is one of them.
- Anger – your values are being challenged. People tell you what you should do, but you just know better and anger is your default response.
This is something that happens to most victims that are not in counseling or professional support groups and we want to place special focus on helping you avoid these situations. The obsessive viewing and exposing of scammers is a manifestation of these.
This is from our Grief Counseling Training Guide Book that will be available in the next few months.
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ARTICLE META
Important Information for New Scam Victims
- Please visit www.ScamVictimsSupport.org – a SCARS Website for New Scam Victims & Sextortion Victims
- Enroll in FREE SCARS Scam Survivor’s School now at www.SCARSeducation.org
- Please visit www.ScamPsychology.org – to more fully understand the psychological concepts involved in scams and scam victim recovery
If you are looking for local trauma counselors please visit counseling.AgainstScams.org or join SCARS for our counseling/therapy benefit: membership.AgainstScams.org
If you need to speak with someone now, you can dial 988 or find phone numbers for crisis hotlines all around the world here: www.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines
A Note About Labeling!
We often use the term ‘scam victim’ in our articles, but this is a convenience to help those searching for information in search engines like Google. It is just a convenience and has no deeper meaning. If you have come through such an experience, YOU are a Survivor! It was not your fault. You are not alone! Axios!
A Question of Trust
At the SCARS Institute, we invite you to do your own research on the topics we speak about and publish, Our team investigates the subject being discussed, especially when it comes to understanding the scam victims-survivors experience. You can do Google searches but in many cases, you will have to wade through scientific papers and studies. However, remember that biases and perspectives matter and influence the outcome. Regardless, we encourage you to explore these topics as thoroughly as you can for your own awareness.
Statement About Victim Blaming
SCARS Institute articles examine different aspects of the scam victim experience, as well as those who may have been secondary victims. This work focuses on understanding victimization through the science of victimology, including common psychological and behavioral responses. The purpose is to help victims and survivors understand why these crimes occurred, reduce shame and self-blame, strengthen recovery programs and victim opportunities, and lower the risk of future victimization.
At times, these discussions may sound uncomfortable, overwhelming, or may be mistaken for blame. They are not. Scam victims are never blamed. Our goal is to explain the mechanisms of deception and the human responses that scammers exploit, and the processes that occur after the scam ends, so victims can better understand what happened to them and why it felt convincing at the time, and what the path looks like going forward.
Articles that address the psychology, neurology, physiology, and other characteristics of scams and the victim experience recognize that all people share cognitive and emotional traits that can be manipulated under the right conditions. These characteristics are not flaws. They are normal human functions that criminals deliberately exploit. Victims typically have little awareness of these mechanisms while a scam is unfolding and a very limited ability to control them. Awareness often comes only after the harm has occurred.
By explaining these processes, these articles help victims make sense of their experiences, understand common post-scam reactions, and identify ways to protect themselves moving forward. This knowledge supports recovery by replacing confusion and self-blame with clarity, context, and self-compassion.
Additional educational material on these topics is available at ScamPsychology.org – ScamsNOW.com and other SCARS Institute websites.
Psychology Disclaimer:
All articles about psychology and the human brain on this website are for information & education only
The information provided in this article is intended for educational and self-help purposes only and should not be construed as a substitute for professional therapy or counseling.
While any self-help techniques outlined herein may be beneficial for scam victims seeking to recover from their experience and move towards recovery, it is important to consult with a qualified mental health professional before initiating any course of action. Each individual’s experience and needs are unique, and what works for one person may not be suitable for another.
Additionally, any approach may not be appropriate for individuals with certain pre-existing mental health conditions or trauma histories. It is advisable to seek guidance from a licensed therapist or counselor who can provide personalized support, guidance, and treatment tailored to your specific needs.
If you are experiencing significant distress or emotional difficulties related to a scam or other traumatic event, please consult your doctor or mental health provider for appropriate care and support.
Also read our SCARS Institute Statement about Professional Care for Scam Victims – click here to go to our ScamsNOW.com website.
It is so possible to stand in our own way during our recovery. That self-doubt about what happened, even feeling shame and guilt, or letting go of those feelings can lead us away from the yellow brick road toward sabotaging our recovery. It is important to recognize how we feel. All too often I have been in a situation recently where I don’t recognize that I’m shallow breathing, feeling anger, that it is building from frustration and then the next thing I know I am standing in the way of my recovery. Thank you for this article and the clarity it brings on what to do when this happens.