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RSN™ Insight: Psychology Of Romance Scams – Scam Junkies
Updated November 2018
Are You A Scam Junkie?
What is that?
We know that scams – during the romance phase can lead to an addiction. It modifies your behavior, your thinking, just like an addiction, because it is one – based upon your addiction to endorphins released by your brain.
In short, victims become dependent on what they get from the scammer. Horrible idea, but true.
But what happens when the scam is over?
You should go through the process of grief. But not everyone does.
Some substitute one dependency for another – an obsession with scammers. You just can’t let go.
It is ok to use your desire to fight back (within reason), or a desire to help others avoid the trap you led yourself into. But if you truly look at what you are doing, is it those? Or is it an obsession with the scammers themselves, all of them.
- Do you spend hours looking or searching for fake profiles?
- Do you want to look at every scammer photo posted?
- Do you go and hunt scammers?
- Do you want to know the name of the real scammer behind the fake act?
- Do you want to know and contact the real person in the photo?
- Do you think these things make a difference?
You may have just substituted one dependency for another.
You may now be a Scam Junkie.
These can be ways of avoiding the hard truth about what happened to you and fighting against your recovery.
The fact is you made a bad decision and now you need to move on, The odds are no one will save you, and no one will get your money back. Worse, all of that emotion that you invested in the scammer was a lie. It is hard to take, you want revenge, you want something to help you make sense of it all.
But it doesn’t make any sense, and you just have to learn how to accept that. It starts by accepting two things. You did this to yourself, and now you need to walk away. You need to move on.
You can’t recover if you constantly surround yourself with scammers. Once you are recovered, and if you want to help others, then come back, but for now stop looking at or for scammers.
If you can’t do that, join a support group where people can help you keep it under control, and where you have someone to talk to.
Stop Being A Scam Junkie – Make The Change And Get Help Now
You can use our RSN Steps™ program for free:
Or join one of our legal online crime victims’ assistance & support groups. Contact us for details.
However, You Have To Look At What You Are Doing And Make A Change
RSN™ Team
a division of SCARS™
Miami Florida U.S.A.
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Tell us about your experiences with Romance Scammers in our Scams Discussion Forum on Facebook »
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FAQ: How Do You Properly Report Scammers?
It is essential that law enforcement knows about scams & scammers, even though there is nothing (in most cases) that they can do.
Always report scams involving money lost or where you received money to:
- Local Police – ask them to take an “informational” police report – say you need it for your insurance
- Your National Police or FBI (www.IC3.gov)
- The Scars Worldwide Reporting Network HERE or on www.Anyscam.com
This helps your government understand the problem, and allows law enforcement to add scammers on watch lists worldwide.
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Visit our NEW Main RSN Facebook page for much more information about scams and online crime: www.facebook.com/RSN.Main.News.And.Inromation.Home.Page
To learn more about SCARS visit www.AgainstRomanceScams.org
Please be sure to report all scammers HERE or on www.Anyscam.com
All original content is Copyright © 1991 – 2018 SCARS All Rights Reserved Worldwide & Webwide – RSN/Romance Scams Now & SCARS/Society of Citizens Against Romance Scams are all trademarks of Society of Citizens Against Romance Scams Inc.
SCARS|RSN Romance Scams Now Editorial Team
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Ive read the article on scam junkies and that describes me. I hate myself for falling for it but keep talking to them. Ive been scammed 4 times and you would think I would learn after the first. But in my mind I give them a chance, well maybe. but the biggest thing when I say out loud what was done, it sounds stupid All I have to show for it damaged credit and using my house to get myself out of the mess. And i trust no one now, and all conversation with people in general is what do they want from me. Ive become secretive dont tell any one whats happened.Tried going to a counselor but couldnt bring myself to tell all that had happen to me. What the scammer has taught me is how to lie. Try telling anyone you get that look (how did she not see what was going on) even from police and family members.
I feel your pain and absolutely understand what you’re going through. It’s the hurt that makes it so difficult. I pray we both overcome this someday soon. Stay strong
I know someone currently involved – sending money. Any tips you can provide to get this person stopped? How do we get him to pull the plug & stop sending money? Please help….
Read our Family Intervention Guide: https://www.romancescamsnow.com/dating-scams/rsn-guide-to-relatives-in-total-denial/
God bless you all your team for helped us .
Thank you
Da,prevarena sam.I to za dosta novac.Trebali je proći dosta vremena dok sam mogla prijaviti ćinjenicu da sam žrtva svoje naivnosti I vjere u lijepe priće.Nisam znala ,a Nisam niti vjerovala da se ljudi bogate na takav naćin.Život mora teći dalje a ja se nadam da će prevarant biti uhvaćen.Sve sam prijavila,i koliko mogu pomažem drugima da ne nasjednu na laži kao ja
If you want to help contact Internet Valkyrja on Facebook – their Romanian Group. JUST REMEMBER, because you were a victim does not mean you know how to help other victims. This is a regulated activity with strong professional standards. First focus on yourself, then take the time to learn to become a professional, then you can truly help others.
I was definitely a scam junkie. I was in shock and so very confuse about what happen to me. I figured out if I stop going on Facebook and other websites I’ll be better off healing from the trauma. It’s even hard to visit this website reading and researching for information. It’s good to know when you’re not alone and other intelligent people had fallen for the same scams. In my case I had too many problems I was dealing with and too busy helping people that didn’t deserve my time of day. I guess I was trying to escape from them and looking for a happier place in life. I understand now how easier for me to become a victim. I avoid has many people possible and removed myself from stressful situations. This includes family and friends not to mention volunteering in a thankless job. I’m mad at myself about forgetting to take care me first. If I done this then I most likely would’ve never fail for these monsters scams. I’ll never be the same person that I use to be.
Tammy, there is good news. The light at the end of the tunnel is not a train – it is just a long way away. This takes much longer to heal than people understand. It may take a year or two to recover emotionally, and even then, scam victims suffer from a form of PTSD – but you will get better, just give it time – lots of freaking time!
Thank you for being here for victims like myself. Much appreciated here because it’s a battle trying to heal when all I want at times is to be alone in the dark.
You are very welcome