A Quick Guide To Spotting Asian Romance Scammers
Chinese ladies are very beautiful, and there are many success stories of marriages between Western men and Chinese women. However, finding the Chinese girl of your dreams can be a long and hard process, especially if you go down the online dating route. There are large numbers of Chinese ladies on most Asian dating sites, but sorting the decent ones from the dishonest ones takes a bit of effort. Thankfully, Chinese dating site scammers are rarer than Thai or Filipina scammers, but you still need to be vigilant.
China can be a bewildering place to understand or visit for a Western Man! Chinese Women equally so!
Here are some ways of reducing the chance of being scammed by a Chinese dating site scam:
- The first and most obvious one is to never send money to somebody you've met online. Break this rule and you're going to regret it later.
By all means send small gifts at certain times of the year (e.g. her birthday, Chinese Valentine's day etc.), but keep your cash in your wallet. Speaking from personal experience, do not send expensive items like jewelry through the Chinese postal system - they'll get stolen. Send bears, plush animals, chocolate and other sentimental but low value items.
- Scammers usually make first contact with you, so be a little more wary of Chinese ladies on dating sites who approach you first.
- Most Chinese scammers are in the 18-25 age group. Avoid these ladies on online dating sites. If you're 40 or older then the age difference is too great anyway. If you're a younger man then avoid the mail order bride route altogether and look for one of the many Chinese students studying in Western countries. Or just take a year out and teach English in China or something.
- Be aware of the bait and switch tactic where a lady you meet on one dating site suggests you move to another in order to talk more easily. This usually means that she's a scammer and wants to avoid detection by the first site, or that she's bait for a more expensive dating site where you'll have to pay much more in order to chat to her.
- Scammers will often be talking to several other men at the same time. Consequently they find it hard to remember their life stories. Take your time chatting to women on dating sites, and if you spot any inconsistencies in what they're telling you then be more wary.
- It is important to remember that scammers operate on all dating sites. Just because you've paid for a membership doesn't make the site any safer. Free dating sites such as DateInAsia are often more hazardous than a subscription site such as Chinese Cupid, but the reality is that there are good and bad ladies on all of the Asian dating sites.
- Chinese ladies in particular often post airbrushed photos of themselves on dating sites. This is largely a cultural thing - Chinese cities are full of photographic studios, and most Chinese ladies will have thousands of photos of themselves at home. While not really a scam, just be aware that that beautiful lady might not look that good in real life. Insist on seeing natural photos before you jump on that plane to Beijing!
- Scammers are more common in modern Chinese cities which are more Westernized. Be particularly careful about ladies living in Nanning, Shenzhen and Shanghai. Ladies from the interior provinces (Hunan, Hubei, Sichuan) are often more honest as they won't be so clued up about how to scam men on dating sites.
- Scammers are usually young and beautiful. If it looks too good to be true, it probably is.
- Probably a bigger problem than dishonest ladies, are dishonest marriage agencies, dating sites and translators.
Sadly, corruption and deceit is common in Chinese business. Many men have had huge problems with the marriage agencies representing the ladies they go to visit in China. Be on your guard at all times. Do not go on any shopping trips with your lady - she may be working with the store owners. Do not trust your translator - especially if supplied by the marriage agency or lady herself. And before you visit China, make sure you have a very good idea of how much stuff should cost in China, otherwise you may get scammed.
- Finally, remember that life in China is hard, with low salaries and long working hours. There are plenty of Chinese ladies who will do anything to leave the country.
So you also need to be on the lookout for green card/visa scammers. These ladies have a longer term game plan, and so they can be a lot more difficult to spot than the basic money scammers. Just be wary of anyone who wants to find a man of any age, or a woman who talks a lot about marriage. Ladies who have friends or family in your country should also be regarded with suspicion, as they might just be looking for a way to join their relatives.
Although there are plenty of internet dating horror stories, bear in mind that usually the victim has broken the first rule. Again - never send money to anyone you've met on an online dating site.
Take your time on dating sites, think with your head, and you should be able to avoid most of the Chinese scammers you may encounter on Asian dating sites.